Lyme Symptoms in the past

So there is this website that most Lymies know of called: canlyme.com. It lists about 75 symptoms of Lyme Disease. I thought I would share with all of you the symptoms that I have had starting in 1995 when I got my initial tick bite. Some of these didn't start until 2005 when I got a second known tick bite. Yes, this is a long post. So sorry, but this is a long illness. I'm sure there are things I've left out. Also, there are things that I haven't told very many people.

• Tick Bite: I saw the tick bite.
  

• Rash at the site of the bite. I don't know if there was a rash for the first tick bite, but other tick bites, there were rashes including the EM rash that is commonly recognized as the Lyme Rash.

• Rashes on other parts of your body. I had rashes (and sometimes still do) all over my body. Sometimes it was on my legs, arms, trunk, face.
  

• Raised Rash, disappearing and recurring. Yes my rashes would pop up and some of them would be raised. They would disappear as quickly as they came on.
  

• Rash, basically circular, oval and spreading out. I had this as well. These rashes were more after the 2005 tick bite.

• Headaches - mile or severe. My headaches were tremendous. They were so significant that my GP ordered an MRI to check for tumors.
  

• Seizures - about 2 weeks after my tick bite in 1995, I started having seizures. Some were shown on EEGs and some were not. The doctors suggested that they were psychosomatic. I never believed that for a moment. They completely ended a few weeks into Lyme treatment.

• Twitching of facial or other muscles. My legs and arms twitched all the time. Most weren't noticeable to people, but at the peak of my illness my husband could feel them if he were holding my hand.
  

• Tingling of nose, tip of tongue, cheek or facial flushing. For a while, I blushed easily. I also had tingling all over. Nose, tongue, cheek, legs, etc.
  

• Stiff or painful neck. I would wake and my neck would be so stiff that I couldn't turn my head. If I did turn my neck, it would be very painful. Most of the time, it would go away after about 2 hours of being awake. It made for a difficult drive b.c I leave for work about 40 minutes after I wake.
  

• Jaw Pain.
  

• Sore throat, Clearing throat a lot, phlegm, hoarseness, runny nose. I often times would wake with a sore throat and runny nose. It was not uncommon for me to get laryngitis. For no reason, I would wake up without being able to speak. I also would have what I called "clogged throat."
  

• Double or blurry vision. at the beginning of my treatment in 2007, I had extremely blurry vision. Because I do wear glasses, it freaked me out. I sought help and my eye doctor was a little bit Lyme literate. She told me that b.c Lyme affects muscles that my muscles were being affected by the bacteria. She thought that with treatment that the blurriness would improve. She was right.
  

• Increased Floaters. Oh My Word. There was one point where the floaters were so bad that I didn't want to be out in the sun at all b.c they were so distracting. Some looked just like the spiral bacteria too. I was very freaky. Again, they improved significantly with treatment.

• Pain in eyes, or swelling around eyes. I often would have swollen lids around my eyes. I'd wake up and they would be swollen. Sometimes it would happen in the middle of the day. It still happens. I attribute it to allergies, but who knows. It could actually be Lyme.

• Sensitivity to Light. For a while, it hurt to even be inside with the lights on. I would sometimes wear my sunglasses inside. I still have to have complete darkness to sleep. Otherwise I wouldn't get any sleep at all.

• Plugged Ears. Sometimes I have moments where I can't hear. It feels as if I have cotton in my ears.

• Buzzing or ringing in ears. There was a point where it was so bad that I wasn't sure if there wasn't something really buzzing in the room. I would have to ask others if they "heard that noise." Once I answered the telephone because I thought the phone was ringing. It was my ears.
  

• Oversensitivity to noise. I couldn't go in a crowded room b.c it was so loud and it caused the headaches to increase 10 fold.

• Diarrhea. I would get cases of having to wake up in the middle of the night b.c this was so bad. It generally only happened between 1am to 4am.

• Bladder: UTI's were often.

• Upset stomach. I would wake up in the middle of the night and run to the bathroom. It would be coming out of both ends. There would be no rhyme or reason for it.

• Bone, Joint Pain, Swelling. My bones and joints ached all the time. My knees, ankles and knuckles would swell.

• Stiffness of joints, back, neck. It's self explanatory.

• Muscle pain or cramps. Almost every single muscle ached.

• Once I started treatment, I had serious trouble catching my breath. It hurt to take a deep breath and I didn't feel like I was getting enough oxygen. It wasn't the case, but it felt that way.

• Chest pain or Rib soreness. My ribs hurt constantly. It sometimes felt as if I had broken them.

• Night Sweats, unexplained chills. The nights I would wake up running to the bathroom, I would be in a cold sweat. I'd be freezing cold and burning up all at the same time. No Fever, but my clothes would be covered with sweat.

• Heart: Sometimes my heart would race or feel like it would skip a beat or two.
  

• Tremors, unexplained shaking: My hands would shake sometimes so hard that I couldn't hold a cup a water without spilling. This was the hardest symptom to "hide."

• Fatigue, Weakness. I felt completely exhausted. Sometimes so bad that I would fall asleep at stop lights.

• Numbness, tingling, pinpricks in body. Sometimes it was so bad that I couldn't feel something that was vibrating. You know those bouncy seats that vibrate? Well I couldn't tell if it vibrating by touching it. I had to listen for the noise. Imagine my shock when I felt it for the first time with my hand. I often felt as if my body was asleep. You know that annoying sensation when you sit in one place too long. Yeah ... I felt like that a lot.

• Poor Balance, Dizziness, Difficulty walking. I often fell. It was embarrassing. Sometimes my dizziness was so bad that I crawled.

• Increased motion sickness. Well I've had this since I was a kid, so I'm not sure whether it was increased or not, but motion sickness during treatment was horrible.
  

• Lightheadedness. I often felt faint when I stood up.
  

• Mood swings: I went through a phase where my mood would dip with the blink of an eye. I was frustrated a lot of the time.

• Unusual depression. Not a pretty topic, but I spent a lot of years depressed. Because of this, I was on antidepressants for a few years. Of course, my doctor thought that my depression was causing my symptoms. Turns out my symptoms were causing my depression. :O

• Disorientation, I got lost all the time. I got lost going home from work, a place I worked at for a number of years.

• Over-emotional reactions. I would cry at the drop of a hat. No reason. It was insane

• Too much sleep. there was a time in which I could sleep 12 to 15 hours, wake for an hour or two and then go back to sleep easily for another 8 hours.

• Difficult falling asleep: in the same breath, some nights were very difficult to fall asleep.

• Narcolepsy. While never officially diagnosed, I did fall asleep quite easily - not always in the bed. In fact, once I fell asleep while talking to the nurse at the front desk of a medical office.

• Panic attacks. Back in 2001, I had serious panic attacks. So much so that I took medication for them. Because I was terrified of addiction, I rarely took them ... but dealt with the anxiety through breathing techniques.

• Memory Loss: Sometimes I would forget days at a time. I think I still have lost memory from the past. Once a friend came to visit me from Virginia. A few weeks later, I mentioned I hadn't seen him in a year. I honestly didn't remember his entire visit. I still don't.

• Confusion: My words get jumbled sometimes.

• Difficulty reading: This was the most troubling problem. I loved to read. I mean, I used to get in trouble in elementary school for reading! So when I brought home a book from the library and struggled to read a page, I cried.

• Going to the wrong place. I once drove to my old place of employment. FOUR YEARS after I quit. I didn't realize I was in the wrong place until I got into the class and the kids didn't know who I was.

• Slow, Stammering speech. Sometimes I would get told "just spit it out already." What those people didn't know was that I was speaking as fast as my brain would let me. It was so frustrating and I couldn't explain that Lyme was causing my brain/speech to be so slow.

• Forgetting how to perform simple tasks. I once forgot how to use the washing machine.

• Phantom smells. Sometimes I would smell foods that hadn't been cooked. Most of the time I smelled Popcorn.

• Unexplained weight loss. I lost quite a bit of weight. I think I got down in the 70's. No reason for it. It took a while for me to get back into the 90's. Now I'm in the triple digits. No one jumped bigger than my doctor when we tipped the scales. :)

• Swollen lymph nodes. Occasionally my lymph nodes in my neck would swell.

• Unexplained "fever" My temp stayed way too low. 96.8 would have been high for me.

• Continual infections: I almost always had some sort of sinus infection.

• Symptoms seem to change, come and go. One day I'd have pain, the next day it would be cognitive problems. I'd make a doctor's appointment for one problem and when I'd arrive that one would be gone and another one would be in its place.

• Pain migrates: Sometimes my right knee would hurt and other times my left elbow. It moved around quite often.

• Flu like symptoms. I don't remember having the "flu" after my 95 tickbite, but I did get it after my 2005 tickbite.

• Allergies Chemical sensitivities, I can not tolerate "smells" of any kind. Makes me sick to my stomach.

Lyme Walk in North Carolin

On this coming Saturday (July 23, 2011), there will be a walk in Albemarle North Carolina. A couple of Lyme warriors have organized this walk. It will be held at ...

City Lake Park

815 concord rd

Albemarle, North Carolina 28001

All funds raised will be going to ILADS. There will be an awareness walk and free hot...dogs, drinks, and cupcakes. There will be a cornhole tournament ($20 per team, 2 game guarantee). The park is rented from 8 to 12. Raffle tickets are $2.

Here is the facebook event page.

https://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/event.php?eid=214406478603459

Living the REMISSION Lyme Life

Yesterday was my wonderful Lyme appointment. I say wonderful because one thing didn't happen. There was no Grab & Jab. That happens July 29th. I say wonderful because of something I read after I left his office.

So at each visit, I go into the waiting room. I sign a piece of paper that says I'm there, what time I arrive and whether I want treatment or not. It's just a cover all our behinds kind of thing. When I'm there for a follow up, I have to fill out another piece of paper that asks what specific improvements or problems I've had since my last visit. Also have to say what specific issues I want addressed and any medications to be listed. I'm taken back for my temp, weight, blood pressure (sitting and standing) and pulse Ox. These are typically all good. Though I did have problems with my temp for a while (being way too low .. and occasionally too high) and my weight was significantly too low, but we've worked out both of those issues. I'm brought back to the waiting room while I read a new set of policies just put in effect and wait for my hero to peer his head through the door.

I was sure to get a smile on his face because while he'd never admit it out loud, I know I'm one of his favorite people. After all, he took me to congress and our picture was in some journal together (though I did never see it). We sat together to see our first viewing of Under Our Skin. So a warm smile from him when he thinks about how far I've come in four plus years is very much expected.

He opens the door and peers his head. Before he could even get my name out, I've bolted out of my seat. We walk back to his most comfortable office where I proceed to tell him that I forgot my cheerleading outfit (which doesn't fit anymore ... :( but symbolic b.c I am his biggest cheer leader) and he kindly reminds me that I used to be the person that always came in dressed crazily. I knew he meant that he could always count on me for a laugh.

We sat down and I haven't been in since December. So he wanted to recount how I've been. I tell him first how well things have gone. I've only been on antibiotics once for Bronchitis since our last visit and those went well. Then, I had to mention the symptoms. I mean I was there to tell him about my symptoms. Well I chart ALL of my symptoms in this calender on google. The problem was that my printer wasn't working and my husband wasn't home to fix it. So I had to rely on the good ole memory banks. That's hard to do sometimes, but I knew the few problems I wanted to discuss.

I told him about the few headaches I've had (which I'm sporting one right now actually). I told him about the problem sleeping sometimes where I wake up from a vivid dream and struggle getting back to sleep. And then there are some nights where I sleep very little. Now those of you that really know me know that in days past I could sleep 12 hours without waking once and at the end of the 12 hours honestly I could wake up about an hour and go back to sleep no problems. I talked about my staring into space and not really being there and spacing out moments. There was one other too private thing (which really isn't that private, but I just don't feel like discussing it on the blog) that I discussed with him.

He dug through my chart and reminded me of some serious symptoms I had in the past. We smiled b.c I had gotten through them. We discussed LDN at length. Discussing that it could possibly be the cause of some of my symptoms, but more likely than not it was something else causing the problem. We discussed how in the past my Progesterone levels were low and this could cause every single one of my problems. So on the 29th, I'll go and have those checked out. We discussed some mineral deficiencies. I've had problems in the past (and probably still have problems). These medicines make me feel so extremely nauseated. So I tend not to take them. So we're working on solutions for that.

We discussed our mutual fear of Lyme creeping back or getting a new infection over every little small symptom. Though I told him I try not to let that anxiety rule my life as it did two years ago. I told him I was in the paper. Oh did you not know? Google News of Orange: Or better yet. It won't be up long b.c they change it weekly, but a picture of Whitney & I were on the front page of News of Orange.

Here is the photo:




http://www.aconews.com/content/current/noc/front/front.pdf

Anyways, in the article you will read what it says under it:

"Both women suffer from Lyme disease, though Allton has already completed her treatment and is almost entirely in remission while Corn is just starting her antibiotic series. Before she could start, Corn had to build up her strength by taking supplements.
Erin Wiltgen / News of Orange"

I wanted to share this with you because ... it's official.

All indications are that Lyme remains in remission potentially even eradicated (though concerns remain that it could return or I could get a new infection). Dr. P said all of this based on my clinical symptoms just as he diagnosed me clinically. However, once my blood work is done and comes back (which should be back by the middle of August) we will know for certain that my symptoms remaining are hormonal in nature and not from Lyme.

Can you see me jumping for joy? I'm THRILLED.

Be Our Guest

So last week, my boss called me to the office. She told me that "they" had been thinking about me and a "fun" project she wanted me to do. When I asked who "they" were, it was my boss and another school director. Well sometimes these "fun" projects aren't exactly fun. Sometimes they are very boring. I waited for her to spit it out.

She asked for me to go over to another school to be Snow White. Well, that fell through for the week, but then another teacher said since I was already being Snow White that I should be Belle at our school. Well, that happened yesterday. I don't do anything 1/2. So my coworker brought her former boss's costume. I slipped into an empty classroom and applied make-up. Though that did have to be done 1/2 b.c I threw away all of my foundation a few months ago.

I just don't wear make-up. I feel itchy and uncomfortable so I just don't use it at all. Since this foundation was about 10 years old, I simply tossed it. I didn't however toss my powder, eye shadows or lipsticks so I went off to work with my tools in a shoe box (should have packed my caboodle, that would have been a blast from a past!). I put on the powder, a ton of eyeshadow, lipstick and mascara and went off to find someone that could fix my hair.

I can do a lot of things, but I haven't mastered a "pretty" up-do. I have mastered the simple bun and pony tail, but pretty Belle do ... well my hair has always been a mystery to me and yesterday my hair was particularly grumpy. So, I called for back-up. Then the back-up called for back-up. I wish I had pictures because wowzer it looked awesome (especially for a 5 minute fix with no bobby pins or hairspray).

I slipped into the bathroom where there was a whole debacle. I felt kind of like it was my wedding day EXCEPT I failed to remember that I would have to pull a shirt over my hair and make-up. So a friend helped me get undressed and redressed. We pinned where the dress needed to be pin. Put on a tiara and special shoes and voila. Ms. Jennifer turned into Princess Belle.

Wow. It's all I can say. Simply Beautiful.

My friend - Whitney

Whitney & I have a funny (in an irony small world) story to tell.

So in March 2011, I received a request on facebook. I set up a VERY small group a few years ago for my friends in NC and SC that have Lyme. When we started, there were maybe 5 of us. Now it's grown to 37 of us. I personally now have met 10 of them including Whitney. So in March I received a "I want to join your group" request. Whenever I get one of these requests, I pretty much send back some questions to the person. It goes something like this:

Hi, My name is Jennifer and I'm the cofounder of (insert group name here). In order to process your request, I need some information from you.

1. Do you have Lyme?
2. Where do you live?
3. How did you hear about the group?


She replies back that she lives in (----insert city name here---- which is about an hour and 10 minutes from me actually). That she's not sure that she has Lyme, but is certain she does. She goes on to tell me a little bit about her symptoms and while usually I don't add people that aren't certain they have Lyme, I figured what the harm. Plus on her friend's list we had a friend in common. And it was a real life friend. So I partially wondered if my friend had told her about my story and was also convinced it was Lyme. In hindsight, they don't know each other. My friend probably thinks that Whitney is another Whitney, but that's another story for another day.

So anyways, Whitney joins my group and we chat for a while. I highly recommend my doctor and to my surprise she starts to go to him. I often will refer people to my Lyme doctor, but honestly 9 out of 10 people start somewhere else first and then come back to me 6 to 10 months later asking for the name of my doctor again.

Well when I first started seeing him, I was completely overwhelmed. All the medications and supplements was enough to drive anyone crazy, much less someone consumed with neuroborreliosis (or with the 'chetes' as we like to call them). So I took a morning and went over to help her organize a chart for her medicine. We became fast friends.

So yesterday, I went to her raffle benefit. OH My WORD. We laughed and laughed until we could laugh no more. We shared our laughter with three other Lymies. Two were from our small group. What a blessing. I didn't win the TV, but I did win award winning looks like this:



Unfortunately, my camera was dying and I didn't get a photo on my camera of Whitney & me.
Hopefully the photo that the reporter took will be much more flattering of the both of us. Yes, there was a reporter. Now most of the time people say "reporter" and I get so nervous that I revert back to introverted Jennifer. Well I met Erin and just absolutely felt like she was friend I hadn't met yet. She was completely awesome and has done two amazing stories on Whitney. I think there will be a third story and she asked for the correct spelling of my name. So I'll probably be in the paper coming up soon of me & my newest best Lyme friend.

Ps. The another story for another day can be shortened for today:

My mother works with a lady that has the same name as Whitney's mother who also has a daughter named Whitney. They live a few counties apart. So my friend Whitney gets a lot of the other Whitney's friend requests. So more than likely, my friend *T* thought she was the other Whitney.

Pps: want to read the stories?

First Lyme article on Whitney: http://www.aconews.com/articles/2011/05/19/noc/news/news13.txt

Second Lyme article on Whitney: http://www.aconews.com/articles/2011/07/06/noc/news/news7.txt

Raffle for my friend

In a bit, I'll be headed out for a friend. A semi-new friend that seems to have been in my life forever. But I just met her this year. She is a Lyme friend. I seem to collect those easily. We share the same doctor. So this afternoon in a bit, I'll be headed out for a friend.

She's having a raffle and an overall good time with family & friends (and who knows maybe even some strangers) to raise money for treatments.

It's been a crazy day already and as soon as I get home, I'll probably do a lot of resting b.c starting Monday my life will be a little bit crazy for a couple of weeks. LOTS of things to do. One is my Lyme appointment a week from today.

Well I better go change into something green for a wonderful event for a wonderful friend.

If you're reading this Whitney, I love ya girl. :}

The Grab & Jab

So whenever I go to get blood work, I typically get the "grab & jab." The lady (typically it IS a lady) slaps a latex band (regardless of me saying ... "LATEX ALLERGY") around my arm. As my arm begins to itch and turn red, she grabs my arm and jabs. This always turns into a hit & miss, where they hit the vein, but then the vein explodes.

Grab & Jab
Hit & Miss

For once I'd love to get a "listen & feel." They listen to my knowlege of my own body and then feel for a proper vein (and listen again when I say that vein will blow).

My favorite lady has left the practice. I haven't gone back since. Though now I am having to go back and I will have to get blood done at some point. I'm scared of the Grab & Jab and the Hit & Miss.

Fireworks

So when I was little I loved to watch them. Hear them, not so much. Fireworks.

We live out in the country. And by country I mean ... we live in a subdivision of country people that love to shoot off fireworks (or guns whatever) for 4th of July (or 3rd .. or 5th or all three).

So on the 3rd and 4th, I got interrupted sleep because of these irritating noise sleep suckers.

Tonight, it's a little more God made.

I'm thankful for the rain. Really I am, but the thunder I've had enough of. It's been two hours of tossing & turning. Two hours of flickering lights (imagine my scare when I "woke" up to see my clock at 9:42 ... when my lights had been turned off).

I'm hot, tired and cranky. Throw in a little PMS and I hate to see what tomorrow is going to bring.

I just want some sleep.

Highs and Lows

This week has been full of them.

Highs: I'm at my all time high of LDN! 3mg.
Lows: I have had a few LDN headaches this week. :( First time since starting in May that I've had an LDN headache.

Highs: Pre-K graduation finally happened after 2 months of planning and preparation
Lows: Vomiting, Crying and Boogers for the children. BUT overall it went fine. Plus, I woke up with sore throat this morning so I think I probably caught something from all those people that were at the graduation. Yes I catch things that fast.

Highs: Got a hand held vacuum for the couch.
Lows: It didn't work as well as I had hoped because the suction is so great that the material from the couch goes into it, but it is somewhat easier than using 1,000 lint brush stickies. It also showed me just how dirty my carpet was. I'll be working on that little project for a long long time. I'm hoping to get just the living room done this week. :/ I use my Dyson (I mean .. the thing is great, but we weren't as stoked about it as we thought we would be) to vacuum the carpet. Then I get on my hands and knees and use the hand held one. Then I use the Dyson again and get out MORE stuff. I've been over this one area of carpet probably 10 times since Thursday and there is STILL stuff coming up into both machines! It is finally getting better.

Highs: I get to see one of my best former work friends this week and work at her center.
Lows: Means I'll be working with new germs -aka teachers & children which means I'll probably really get sick- which means I'll probably be sick over the 4th of July weekend.

Highs .... MY DAD IS HEART HEALTHY! He had several tests last week and got the results that his heart was healthy. You have no idea how much weight was lifted off my shoulders.

LDN Update

I've been on 3mg all week! Okay Okay that's a bit of an exaggeration. I skipped one night b.c I was so exhausted from not sleeping that great that I just decided to skip it. BUT, other than that .... 3mg of LDN. Dr. P is going to be so excited for me. Now we just need to pray that my numbers are doing what they are supposed to be doing.

:)

So you think you can (blog about it)

Whooooooooooooooooooo. So You Think You Can Dance is back and SO IS MARY MURPHY!!!!!!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

All 20 dancers are absolutely remarkable! I think that any one of these dancers would have given previous season winners a run for their money. However, I already have a few favorites. On the very first show I thought that Marko was a shoe in for the Top 20. Then after watching Melanie's audition, I thought to myself about the possible pairing of the two of them. Well my dear friends, looks like I got my wish! :o)

You see sometimes two remarkable dancers get together with a tremendous choreography and tremendous dancers and it turns out to be "pffffffffffffft" because there is no connection between the two dancers. Well, Melanie plus Marko plus Travis Wall = one fabulous piece. Wow. It was superb. I can not wait to see the next piece they dance together. Hopefully it doesn't disappoint.

We got a shocker at the beginning of the show letting us know that Mitchell wouldn't be performing because he had injured himself. Well as soon as I found out the piece was a Sonya choregraphed piece, I was thrilled for Caitlynn because I was certain she would either be dancing with Mark or Robert Roldan. They are up there with two of my favorite dancers. Well the show didn't disappoint. Caitlynn plus Robert plus Sonya? WOW! It was really hard to watch Caitlynn though because my eyes were staring at Robert!

Here are my lists!

1. Melanie 2. Caitlynn 3. Miranda 4. Missy 5. Ryan
6. Ivetta 7. Jordan 8. Sasha 9. Clarice 10. Ashley


I personally think Robert Roldan has gotten even BETTER since his season. Wow. He might would have won this season. :} Though he would have a fight with Marko. So with that said, here is my list of guys.

1. Marko

were there any other guys? Oh wait yes there were.
2. Nick 3. Jess 4. Tadd 5. Wadi 6. Robert (the *twitchy whoo man Urkel*)
7. Ricky 8. Alexander 9. Chris 10. Mitchell (just b.c he didn't dance)

Couples with commentary:

1. Melanie & Marko: loved the dance with Travis Wall. To paraphrase Mary, they had me at hello. Wow. I had chill bumps with this statuesque piece.

2. Caitlynn with Robert (in place of Mitchell). Wow did I get lucky to see Robert Roldan dance again. I truly hope he's an All Star. Would have also loved to have seen Mark dance this piece too, but wow. I wonder if in the end if we'll get to see Caitlynn dance this with Mitchell. I'm not sure if we would have had the fantastic results though. Who knows. I think Robert gave Caitlynn a leg up in the competition by getting to dance with him so early. ;) Can you tell I'm a Robert fan? And it's not just because he shares the same name as my husband. :)


3. Miranda and Robert. I was sitting on the couch dancing with them. They are so much fun. I personally love Robert's whoo personality. I think we'd be friends. and for the record if I were on the show, I'd be the "OH?" dancer. I have several different "oh's." I use it all the time. If you've never noticed before in life, you'll notice it now.

4. Missy & Wadi (Sean Cheeseman): How talented is that Wadi? Wow. I can't believe he could pick up the choreography and perform so well WITH A PARTNER for the first time! I think that they'll be in my favorites quickly. I hope Missy can show her softer side. It's awesome to be such a strong dancer, but my favorites are versatile. So I'm hoping to see it next show. For the record, I can't wait to see them dance a Sonya routine! :) Though that just contradicts everything I just said about being softer. ;)

5. Ivetta & Nick (Jason): It was obvious that Ivetta would do so well with the Quick Step, but I honestly can't believe Nick did so well at the kiss of death. wow Nick.


6. Sasha & Alexander (Travis): I liked them but it wasn't memorable. I couldn't even remember it at first and had to watch it again.



*** for some reason these four numbers didn't work for me. It had more to do with the choregraphy than it did the actual dancers b.c they did well with what they had to do and I love Jess, Ryan, Jordan, Tadd and Chris.

7. Clarice & Jess (Tyce --- for the record, if Jess hadn't been in this piece it would be number 10, not number 7)
8. Ryan & Ricky (Chris Scott)
9. Jordan & Tadd (Sean)
10. Ashley & Chris (Chris)


Can't wait to see the next episode. I don't know how the judges are going to kick off four people.

Swimming

So when I was a child, I really didn't enjoy swimming to start. Then there came a time where I just wanted to be at the pool all the time. Then, I just stopped. I didn't want to be out in the sun. I didn't want to be in the pool with a whole bunch of germ infested people. So typically, I honestly only going "swimming" about once (maybe twice) a season.

Well, I have already been three times this season. The crazy part is that instead of just standing around chatting with whomever I'm with, I've actually been SWIMMING! So my neighbor has a pool and we pretty much have a standing invitation to go over whenever we want, but we rarely take her up on it. A couple of weekends ago, they were going out of town for the day and told us we could come over and "swim" (it's not really big enough to really go swimming). That particular day I wasn't feeling well and only wound up there for 20 minutes, but the water did feel good.

My best friend lives in an apartment complex and they have a pool. A lot of pools now a days don't much go above 5 feet, but this one reaches depths of 9 feet. I have been twice this season and yesterday ... I actually SWAM. I didn't stay by the edge of the pool. I SWAM. Now let me tell you this, it's been years (probably decades) since I've swam as hard as I swam yesterday. My body is telling on me today, but boy did I have fun.

LDN Update:

It's been 5 weeks. I started at 2.75mg last night. Slept so so.

4th week of LDN (plus ...)

I started LDN on May 6th. So it's been almost one month since I restarted this medication. Now, the last time, I was able to get to only 1.5mg and had to stop because the headaches were so severe that I just couldn't get through the day.

Friday the 27th: I started 2.25mg. On Saturday I had the staring problem and a couple of bumps where the picc line was, but overall a good day. I repeated the 2.25 each night.

Sunday: I was fatigued all day because I didn't sleep well Saturday night. Other than the fatigue and the picc line bumps (I had a whopping 6 of them!), I had an overall good day.

Monday: Sunday night it took me a while to get to sleep, but once I was asleep I slept well. I had a bout of nausea and fatigue in the morning, but the afternoon was much better.

Tuesday: I slept really poorly Monday night so it left me extremely exhausted and feeling ugh first thing Tuesday morning, but I did have an overall good day until it was bedtime when I felt "ugh" again.

Wednesday: Slept okay Tuesday night, but was fatigued all day Wednesday.

Thursday: Wednesday night I had constant dreams. I woke up Thursday morning with very swollen fingers. Had an overall good day.

Friday: Slept well Thursday night and had an overall good day.

So my biggest four symptoms were fatigue, sleep difficulties, feeling ugh and the bumps. Neither were enough to keep me from increasing. Last night I began 2.5mg!

Plus:

I got a new bathing suit last week. I have to admit (like most women I know) I don't like shopping for bathing suits. In fact, I detest it. In fact, I don't really like clothes shopping period. HOWEVER, my new suit is way cute! I tried to find it online, but I couldn't so you'll just have to trust me. It's cute. :)

Finally ... a note on procrastination

Procrastination ---


Finally doing something in July that should have been done in February. That my dear blog readers is .. Procrastination at its finest!

Today I did two things I have been taking my sweet time doing.

First, I made my follow up appointment for my LLMD.
Second, I called in a refill for my LDN.

I'm hoping that by then, I'll be up to 3mg! My LLMD will be jumping through the roof if I can do this. I had no idea it could be done and now .. I'm so close! 2.25 ... that's only .75mg away! If I go the way I've been going, I'll be there in 2.5 weeks!

See what procrastinating got me? I couldn't have done this 6 months ago. :)

3rd week of LDN ... Plus ...

I stared 2mg of LDN on last Friday night. Friday night I slept wonderfully. I was completely shocked, but I did wake up with swollen fingers. However I had a pretty good day symptom wise.

I also slept well Saturday night, but I did have some serious allergy problems so I was forced to take a Claritin (my eyes were red & itchy). I also had some serious malaise and took an afternoon nap (not because I wanted to but because I had to).

Sunday night was a okay, but I did have several dreams that disrupted my sleep. So that caused me to be fatigued in the morning. I also had a small headache in the morning on Monday, but overall had a pretty good day. I was feeling like I was on a roll. Even with the severe malaise on Sunday night, I was doing pretty good on the 2mg LDN!

Monday night was a completely different story. I slept very poorly. I woke up every hour with nightmares and Tuesday I had body aches, picc line bumps (remember those pesky things that I really haven't had in months ....????), serious fatigue and what I call electric headaches. The pain shot right from the back of my brain up to the front of the brain. It would happen when I moved suddenly. It was an absolutely horrible day. I pushed through the pain and took another 2mg on Tuesday night.

I had some difficulty sleeping, but did have an okay day on Wednesday with only slight fatigue so another round of 2mg was in order. I slept better Wednesday night and had a great day on Thursday. In fact, I noted not a single symptom on Thursday at all! I slept great on Thursday night and my Friday morning was great. Friday evening I wound up with 6 bumps where the picc line used to be and a little bit of fatigue, but I felt comfortable enough to bump my LDN to 2.25mg!

I slept perfectly on Friday night. I went to bed and slept almost 12 straight hours without waking! I don't really like to sleep *that* long, but it was nice not waking up with dreams/nightmares. I felt really refreshed yesterday so I took my best friend up on his offer to go swimming. I swam (aka stood in the water and sometimes treaded in the deep end ... and occasionally actually swam) for almost two hours. I had very few symptoms on Saturday after the .25 increase. The only thing that was notably obvious was my "staring" symptom.

This is something that I really haven't talked about, but it's a problem I've had for quite some time. I honestly never really noticed it until about 8 years ago when someone commented that I needed to stop staring "at that lady." Well the thing was .. I wasn't staring at a lady ... I was just staring and it just happened to be in the direction of this lady in the restaurant. It was then that I realized I did it a lot and had done it a lot in the past.

Well in the last few years, the "staring" episodes have decreased until ... yesterday. I'm not sure if it was because (insert joke here) my brain was infected with chlorine (snorting very loudly ) or if it was because I was tired ... or something else, but I could not stop staring. My eyes would scan the room and then stop .... sometimes it was at a person, or an item or nothing at all. It was crazy! Fortunately my friend knows this happens so he was able to get me back on track most of the time before I looked like a crazy person. Anyways, there ya go. I have a problem with staring so if you & I ever hang out .. and I start to stare ... you know it's not my personal preference to stare .. at you or whatever it is I'm spacing out at .. it's just part of my Lyme symptoms sneaking out on me.


Plus:

Lightning Strike is still wreaking havoc. Still our phone is having issues. Still they haven't buried our permanent line. However ....

Our dishwasher is a dream! It's so very quiet. I hate that our old one was killed by lightning, but it was a blessing in disguise.

P.S. plan is to take 2.25mg the rest of the week until Friday and then increase to 2.5mg. AND I guess I'll have to make that follow-up now. The doctor's office called and left a message reminding me to come in for a follow up. At least I'll have something wonderful to tell him! (that I've been able to increase the 1mg of LDN to 2.25mg! and I'm really hoping to have it up to 3mg by the middle of June!)

P.P.S It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

2nd week of LDN Plus ...

So this week was my 2nd week of LDN. Plus we discovered that our dishwasher was fried by the lightning too. So we went dishwasher shopping yesterday and today. We found one we really liked at Lowe's, but we debating on it because it was so "expensive." So we went to Home Depot and shopped at Sears online. It was there that we discovered the same dishwasher we wanted at Lowe's for $234 cheaper! Wow. So we went up to Sears to feel it out in person and it was 134 more dollars in the store than online. We bought it online and are having it shipped for free to the store. We'll pick it up one day next week.

Now onto the LDN Update:

On Saturday the 14th, I had a terrible day. I was exhausted all day. I had a headache that lasted all day and Tylenol didn't touch it. To top it off, that was the morning that the lightning struck our property. Because the symptoms were so severe, I decided to only take a 1.25mg Saturday night.

On Sunday the 15th, I was less fatigued, but I was still pretty tired. However I did sleep all night from Saturday to Sunday. Since my other symptoms were pretty void, I decided to take 1.5mg. I went to bed really late because of Survivor Finale.

On Monday, I was what I like to call "Zombie tired." I had an aura all day and felt as if a seizure could come on, but one never came to pass. (thank God). I felt fevered all day and pure exhausted, but I knew that there were a couple of reasons to explain this other than the 1.5mg of LDN so I took another 1.5mg dose.

Tuesday: From Monday into Tuesday, I had very vivid dreams from 2 to 5. I was also very cold all day Tuesday. However, I felt so great other than that that I decided to go ahead and take A WHOPPING 1.75MG! Woo hoo.

Wednesday: I had another bad day. I was very fatigued. I woke up often Tuesday into Wednesday and this was a huge impact on my stamina. So I only took 1.5mg that night.

Thursday: I slept really well Wednesday into Thursday and my headache was better. I had an overall great day so I took 1.75mg of LDN.

Friday: I've had a pretty good day though I did wake with very swollen fingers (my rings wouldn't fit on) and a small headache. I took some Tylenol and it took care of it. I only needed 1/2 my normal dose too. So that's good. I slept well Thursday night only waking once and that really didn't count because it was at 5am (my normal wake up time for week days). I took today off work because my Mother in law had surgery. She's back at home so the surgery went well. My plan ... in a few minutes ... is to see how I feel tomorrow after taking TWO MG of LDN tonight! Since I don't have to work and it doesn't really matter how badly I feel, I thought I'd take a risk!

So that's how things are going so far this go around. Here is hoping I don't have vivid nightmares or a headache tomorrow.


Update: I slept mostly through the night ONLY woke up ONCE! I remember having some dreams, but don't remember what they were about so that's actually completely awesome! AND my head feels pretty good this morning. I have some swollen hands and feet, but hey .. I'll take that!

Boom Boom Pow

Not the song, but the lightning and thunderstorm last night was Boom Boom Pow.

It was a bit crazy over here. I didn't sleep well through it, but once I heard a little pop (okay a loud pop) and hail, I was outta bed! I woke to find that one outlet in the kitchen was kapoot and that a breaker was probably fried (b.c there was no electricity in the computer or other bedroom) and that our phone line was dead. Nothing appeared to be a direct hit to the house, but rather a hit to something else that slowly leaked to the house.

I went back to bed and struggled to sleep. When I did get out of bed, found out that the telephone cover was blown off our house so that our phone line wasn't going to get fixed until the phone company comes down (and we're still waiting) to fix it. More than likely will be a temporary fix first and then a permanent one. My husband fixed the breaker and the electrical outlet. Our wireless router is fried along with my beloved electric blanket (well the controller).

Crazy. In any case, we are all okay. I'm sure we'll find other things that have been struck. There is a huge hole at the base of one of our Bradford Pear trees. Add to that: we've found that our doorbell is also broken.



On other "electric" news. Scotty McCreery is back in town! If I were a country fan, it would be a huge deal. But he's taken over the television today! I wish the kid luck, but I'll be honest ... I haven't watched this season at all and country music makes me cringe.

One week of LDN

I started LDN again one week ago tonight. I took 1mg dose and went to bed. I slept all night and barely even budged that night. It was a good start. The next morning, I felt very warm and had a small headache, but it wasn't enough to keep me from taking another dose Saturday. Sunday morning I was very warm and my hands were swollen a bit. That afternoon I felt a bit off kilter. I was a bit dizzy and off balance, but nothing to keep me from taking another dose.

In fact, I decided to up my dose to 1.5mg. Within 15 minutes, my heart rate increased. I did go to sleep, but my sleep was disrupted with dreams. Monday I woke up exhausted and stayed fatigued through the day, but it was a fairly good day symptom wise. So I decided to take another 1.5mg dose Monday night. The next morning I felt pretty good., but in the afternoon and evening I felt very warm, off kilter and had a small headache.

This caused me to reduce my dosage to 1.25 mg. I didn't want to drop all the way down to 1mg and I didn't want to repeat the 1.5 so I went right down the middle. I woke up every 2 hours throughout the night. I had dry mouth and skin upon each waking. I had funny heart flutters in the afternoon, but they were gone by the time it was time to take the LDN. I decided to go ahead and take another 1.5mg dose that Wednesday night.

In the middle of the night, I woke to find that my fingers were swelling so I took off my wedding rings. When I woke at 5am, my fingers were so swollen that my rings wouldn't go back on. By that afternoon, my fingers had returned to their normal size. Other than a slight bit of fatigue from waking up in the middle of the night, I had a pretty good day. So Thursday night I took another 1.5mg dose. I slept well from Thursday into Friday, but Friday morning from midnight to 5am I woke 3 times.

That brings us to this morning. I actually had a pretty good day, but I woke with a slight headache. However, it went away after a few hours. I did feel fatigue through the day as well. I plan on taking another 1.5 mg. I'm so thrilled that things are going well this time around. I don't remember taking this many 1.5 mg in a row before. I'm hoping that I'll be able to up my dosage to 1.75 before long!

My Mom had to endure this ....

What this teenager wouldn't do to watch a little Doogie Howser. Remember, this was before VCRs were really big much less DVR's. I had to watch all episodes live (IN THE LIVING ROOM NONE-THE-LESS!).



Then there was the year I met this marvelous basketball player and drooled over him. Oh who am I kidding, I still drool over him a bit almost 2 decades later.


Then I was in love with Patrick Dempsey BEFORE he was hot!



Then there was Michael J Fox



See what all my Mother had to endure?

Happy Mother's Day Mom. Thanks for putting up with all my celebrity crushes! :)

Dose 2

I slept all night and woke up with no headache after the 2nd 1mg dose of LDN. I do remember having some vivid dreams, but none really vivid enough to keep me awake. This is the huge problem I have with LDN. So hopefully it will remain this way. I did wake up a little "swollen" and "hot," but I can tolerate the tiny bits of this if it indeed helps my immune system function properly.

I'll probably go ahead and increase to the 1.5 mg soon. Usually I have much more symptoms than this on even the 1mg. So I'm pleased as punch to be making some headway already.

Lyme Awareness

Part of Lyme Awareness is truthfully being away that Lyme just never really goes away. So in this truth, I have to look at myself. I have to remember that it is always there. It may be hidden, but it is there. I must keep working to keep my immune system in good shape so that the Lyme bug doesn't come out and wreck my body.

Over the past few months I have experienced several health set backs. I've been on antibiotics twice for different things and recently (this past week) experienced the ever so much fun urinary tract infection. I didn't go get tested for it, but I knew it was there. I also have this most wonderful supplement for Urinary Tract Support called Mannose D Powder. I decided that I would give it try and see if it would help before going in to the doctors to get tested (and then antibiotics when the test proved positive).

It's something that can be taken 1/4 teaspoon to 1 teaspoon 1 to 3 times a day. In the past, I have used 1/2 teaspoon twice a day. This time since my symptoms were so severe, I decided to go ahead and max dose it at 1 teaspoon 3 times a day. I did this for 3 full days and then decreased it to 1/2 teaspoon 3 times a day. Yesterday I did it for 1/2 teaspoon 2 a day and today I haven't even taken my dose yet. However, I'm not going nearly as frequently and things are improving. I'll probably stay at this 1/4 teaspoon 3 times a day for a few more days and then stop. If things go back, then I'll have to go see a doctor for testing. However I'm confident that things will stay great.

With all of this in mind, I decided it was time to go back to the regiment that I should have been on. Back to the LDN. 1mg last night. I can tell today. :( Headache, swollen hands and feeling hot (though I don't have a temp). I just got to push through this initial phase. Wish me luck and remember

Stay Lyme Aware.

Lyme Awareness month

It's Lyme Disease Awareness month. Check out your local PBS station to see if they are playing Under Our Skin this month. It the Raleigh Durham area, it's being aired on May 17th at 8pm on UNC-TV (most people's Channel 4 I think). Check this documentary out. The first time I watched it, I got sad. The second time I watched it, I got mad. The third and fourth time I learned something new. Please DVR it so you can watch it time and time again.

I still have my Lyme Green ribbon up, though I'm in desperate need of a new one. This one has been out for a year! Share the Lyme Light by educating others on this disease.

since I last posted

Two sets of friends are in need of your prayers.

I don't want to name names, but both set of friends I've known for a while. Two of them I've known since elementary school and the other two I've known for ten years.

W & J lost their father late last night, early this morning. When I was in elementary school, I was extremely close to W & his Dad. His Dad had a way that just made me chuckle. He looked just like Yosemite Sam and whenever I think about my elementary school friends ... his son is one of the first that comes to mind. I just saw him for the first time in quite some time Easter 2010. I gave him a huge hug and he called me my mother's name until he realized that I was the tiny little Jennifer all grown up. So please pray for my friend's family.

V & J lost their Uncle early yesterday morning. V was one of my first friends after I married my husband. She was one of the first people in my world that didn't know me by Jennifer (insert maiden name). We worked together and her little brother would come in often to hang out while we worked our hind parts off. During the time we worked together, I became close with her mom & dad. Their Uncle that passed was their Mom's brother. While I've never met him, I know the close bond that their family shares. Their Uncle has been sick for quite some time and while it was expected, it's still a difficult time for their family.

My heart aches for all of them and if I could, I'd put my arms around each one and let them know how special they are to me. I'm just not sure I'll be able to see any of them anytime soon.

I've also heard that in the last week we've lost 2 people in the Lyme community. If I do say so myself, this week stinks.

I know I know

I know I've been quiet. Between being really busy at work and being really busy at home and being sick off and on, I've just been quiet. There have been a couple of anniversaries and birthdays.

Health: I'm okay, but the past couple of weeks I've had several really bad migraines. I'm pushing through them and finally today it eased off. I'm hoping that it will be through, but I think it has to do part weather and part stress.

Anniversaries: Rob & I celebrated our 11 year wedding anniversary on the 15th. Then two days ago, it was the one year anniversary of my Grandfather going "home." Today was the 2nd anniversary of my friend Pam going "home."

Birthdays and a BIRTH day: My niece Piper turned one! Happy Birthday Piper. My sister had her 5th baby and he's precious.

April has been quite a month, a busy month. I am glad that May is almost here.

62 Tornadoes in NC

Yesterday was a frightful day in North Carolina (and surrounding states). There were 62 tornadoes. I spent a good portion of 15 minutes in the bathroom terrified, though most of the day shaking in my skin. I thought there was a good possibility that we'd get hit by one of the many tornadoes. There are 24 deaths in North Carolina confirmed so far.

Many stores including a Lowe's Home Improvement store were destroyed. One university has suspended classes for the duration of the Spring Semester because of damage to the building. Many schools will be delayed or closed. Many families lost their homes and many people lost loved ones.

Thankfully, my neighborhood was unscathed and as far as I know all my friends and family members are safe. However I know people that are friends with people that lost family. They are devastated and for that I am devastated for them.

I'm still kicking

I just haven't been around much lately. I've been working hard and for some reason neglecting this.

Yesterday I had a very exciting day. I drove a little over an hour to meet someone I've been talking with online about Lyme. I am now proud to call her a friend. I spent quite a long time there and we even watched Under Our Skin together. We talked a lot about Lyme, but mostly about life.
Yesterday I felt as if we were old dear friends that were hanging out on the couch instead of people that were strangers less than two months ago.

The project

We're having a gallery auction. The kids are going to create one masterpiece (one per class) and we'll auction them off. The highest bidder wins. The money is going to help the Tsunami Victims in Japan. I purchased the materials for the project and gave it out on Friday. I can't wait to see each classrooms creations.

sometimes I wake up

in such a great mood. I have no idea why, but I wake up SMILING. It's such a great feeling! :}

I have a post in mind to do, but I've not had time (imagine that!) to work on it. I'm working on a really big project at work and it pretty much consumes my mind at all times. I'll share about that later because I'm really excited about it. Anyways .... got to run to work (or drive ... that's my preference since it's a good 45 minute drive).

Surviving the Raw Nose

I've seen to get over the worst part of the illness. I'm still coughing (which always lasts forever), but the thing that surprises me is the amount of mucus! Oh My Word. It just seems to be non-stopped. My nose was pure raw from the blowing. I finally had to pull out vaseline and pretty much lather it on my nose and lips after every single nose-blow.

Update

So I was pretty sick over night. Yesterday I fought to stay at work. Probably paid the price last night. I was doing pretty well, but decided on a whim to take some Night Time Delsym. Figured it would help me sleep and keep the coughing at bay over night. So I took the dose around 8pm. Around midnight, I woke up burning up. I thought that I had turned up my electric blanket so I checked it. It was OFF. Apparently I was so hot that I turned it off in my sleep. There are 10 levels on my blanket and I generally sleep with it on level 3 or 4. Sometimes hotter and sometimes cooler, but mostly 4. So I was shocked when it was OFF.

I decided to check my temperature and was a little stunned when I saw it say 100.5. I decided to wait 30 minutes to recheck and as I laid there ... I got hotter and hotter. When I rechecked it hit the 102 mark. I decided it was time to go ahead and take Tylenol. I went ahead and got a bottled water and Tylenol thinking that soon I'd be able to go back to sleep. Well by 2am, my temperature had reached a shocking 103.5. I stumbled into the kitchen to get a cool wet cloth for my body. I knew I had to take care of that fever quickly, but I can't take Motrin. Motrin makes my eyes swell up. It may help with the fever, but the last time I took Motrin I wound up at the Urgent Care getting a Steroid Shot.

I argued with myself over whether to use the Motrin or not and in the end decided that I would hold off. I continued to check. At 3:30am, it was 104.6. At this point I was pretty much out of it trying to sip water. Throughout all of this, I talked out loud to God. I knew He was with me. I knew He wouldn't give me more than I could handle. I remember asking for him to take away the fever. Somewhere around 4, I essentially passed out and woke at 5am when my alarm went off. I felt the coolness of the sweat and knew my fever broke.

Needless to say, I will be starting those antibiotics because I haven't gotten any better and all the factors my doctor said to watch out for started. I'm so glad to be alive. I'm so glad to be alive. Praise God I'm still alive.

cough cough sneeze

Because I'll have a long day of work tomorrow and because my head hadn't improved with Claritin or Zyrtec or Tylenol or any other thing and this morning was even worse, I decided to cough my way to the doctor.

I sound completely pathetic so if no one gets phone calls this week ... it's because it is down right frustrating to talk. When I left work today, I called over to my PCP to see if by chance they could squeeze in a sick visit. I was thrilled when they asked if I would be willing to see "K." "K" is the nurse practitioner that I saw before my diagnosis. She sent me here and there trying to find out what was wrong with me. Though I was frustrated with no diagnosis, I loved seeing her. She knows my "preferences." And what I mean by that is that she knows which antibiotics I prefer and she also knows that I prefer to do something else before antibiotics. So I went in today telling her about my symptoms. I knew that I didn't have an infection yet, but I also knew that within 24 to 48 hours I might.

I told her what I had tried (minus some special integrative things that she probably has never heard of) and what I thought. She investigated (looking at my ears, nose and throat) and told me that there was no infection (yet), but that she would write me a script just in case the tides turned. She also sent me on my way with 7 days worth of samples of Singulair ( I used to take it before Lyme during the seasonal times). I get to take this and hopefully it will improve. If not, then Zithromax will be my friend again. While it's not my favorite antibiotic, I know it works.

Gah! These pollinating trees are going to be the death of me. I think every bone in my face hurts. Hopefully the Singulair will work and I won't need the Z pack.

Allergy Season

I love March for one reason. It's March Madness. Basketball. UNC.

However March also makes me mad. It's the start of allergy season. So I woke up yesterday with a small sore throat and itchy eyes. Thought I'd "work through it" on my own, but this morning I woke wiht even more sore throat, irritating nose drippage and a small cough. All this tells me, I better jump on this and quick. Leucozepin, Zinc, Total B drops, Vitamin D ... to start. Then add in a Claritin and finally ... I had to add in Tylenol.

I'm hoping to be able to knock this out before it turns into an infection. Lately I've not been able to do that, but we'll see.

Madness, March Madness. One part exhilarating and the other part frustrating. Speaking of both the weather and basketball.

Is it summer yet?

I'm ready for summer because I'm ready for So You Think You Can Dance. I am wanting it so bad that I googled some dancing. And I found this:




Well this search led me to look up the artist of the song. I looked her up. I couldn't believe it.
She's actually a friend of mine. I didn't realize she was a singer/song writer. We had never talked about our careers. We had only talked about bad Doctors, Integrative Medicine, PICC Lines, Heavy Metal Poisoning and Lyme Disease. Anyways, I wanted to share with you Alisa's music.

Here's the full song called Breathing by Alisa Turner



Here is another song that I just have fallen in love with .. I can't get the tune out of my head.It's called Trouble.



Alisa is so sweet. I've seen her struggles, her troubles and she's seen what few have seen. Me at my very worst at the peak of my condition.

If you check out her music page on myspace, you can hear her music there too.

http://www.myspace.com/alisaturner/music/songs/trouble-68778538

Roller Coaster Changes

Life is funny sometimes. It wasn't too awfully long ago that I cried almost every day. Then one day, I forced myself to change. I didn't even realize how upset I was all the time until a friend pointed it out. She asked what happened to the bubbly Jennifer she used to know. Oh what a question that was. I thought and thought and realized that the bubbly Jennifer was still there, but very guarded. It was in that moment I made a choice to change back. I slowly chipped away at the bad bits and even through the worst moments of my life managed to smile through the pain. I opened up my soul, my heart, my spirit to those around me. Every day, I change just a little bit. And today as I was thinking about this, it reminded me about this song sung by Addison Road. I realized that no one is perfect, not even those that we look up to and respect. Even those that we've known for a while can do things that hurt us. So what do we do when someone we respect and look up to hurts us or someone we love? We forgive because one day ... there will be a change in the making.

Has it really been four years?

It's hard to believe that today marks the fourth year of my Lyme diagnosis. I can't believe I've been through hard core antibiotic treatment, hard core IV alternative treatment and came out the other side of the Lyme life.

I can't believe it's been four years since a doctor finally listened to me and explained to me why I had Lyme Disease and why all the testing had been wrong. I'm so blessed to be alive. Four years and a day ago, I honestly thought I was dying. And here I am, four years later, blessed to be alive. Thank you God for sending me a phenomenal doctor who thinks outside the box.

Because he thought outside of the box, I've been able to live.

Flowers courtesy of my wonderfully thoughtful husband on Valentine's Day.

Sensory Overload

Sometimes I have days where every little thing irritates me. Every night I pretty much have the same routine. Between 7pm and 8pm, I crawl into bed and play a CD that helps me relax and fall asleep. We have the room darker than a cave for most people's standards, but for me some nights ... it just isn't dark enough. The little red light on the TV when it's powered off might as well be a flashlight. I already have black tape covering the time on the clock, but the light that glows behind it ... might as well not even have it covered. I use an electronic toothbrush. I can't charge it at night because the glow is way too bright. Now on most nights I can ignore these little "lights." (this doesn't even talk about the sound that the TV makes when it's not on or the computers from the other room or the cars and dogs that are outside making noise that live down the street). Last night on the other hand. All these little things kept me from going to sleep. Sensory Overload.

I played my CD 3 times before giving up and getting up. Then I was up for an hour before laying back down for the CD to play twice before I just turned on the television set. Then I played it one final time and finally fell asleep sometime between 4 and 4:15. I fell asleep after 4am, but before 4:15am. My alarm goes off at 5am. 45 minutes of sleep I figure with waking once during that time to think "good I finally fell asleep."

Hopefully I can function today.

Closet Update

Photo taken today. It's still clean! :o)

The Closet

So in January (9th and 10th), I cleaned and organized the closet. I took photographs and posted. Once the batteries in my camera recharge, I'll post a picture of the state of the closet now. But first, who thinks it's still clean 37 days later?

Losing Friends

Today my heart sank to my stomach. I woke up to see a friend's status on Facebook. My heart sank a little bit for her. I saw that she lost a friend to lung cancer. I saw the first name of her friend and prayed that it wasn't a friend of mine from many years ago. I went onto work. I didn't think about it again. Then my boss called me into the office as I was leaving. The words stung my heart and pierced my soul.

"Pam (removed last name) passed away last night. " I felt the lump form in my throat. It was all I could do to hold the tears back. The only thing that made this loss different from our last friend that went to Heaven was that her family had preparation. Her family knew this was coming. A loss of a friend/family member when you know is difficult, but along the journey of the rest of their life you mourn.

My heart aches for my friend's family. My heart aches for her beautiful daughters, her husband of 32 years and anyone that ever crossed her path. Forgive me if I'm quiet. I tend to retreat when I mourn.

Move that Rubber Tree Plant

I am

I was talking with a new friend last night. It got me to thinking about all the things I am. I often wonder about people's first impression about me and about my own first impressions about others. Let's face the cold hard truth that when we meet people we try to put our best foot forward. We try to offer all the best parts of ourselves to them and peel back the layers of ourselves a little bit at a time.

There are many things that we can learn just based on LOOKING at a person and then there are things we learn by LISTENING. Then there are things we think we know by ASSUMING.

If I show you these two photographs ... what might you assume?


Assumption: Lover of outdoors
Fact: 15 minutes outside is 15 minutes too long.

Who am I? By my choosing, I am several things. I am Christian. I am a wife and friend. I am a teacher. I am a college graduate. These are things I chose to do. Then there are things that I am that I have no control over. I am proud just the same, but they weren't under my control. They were things I was born into. I am a daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece. There are so many other things that I am.

But there is one more thing that affects my daily life, but it is not who I am ... it is what I have. It took me years to say it comfortably. If you're just beginning your journey, it may take you a while too. However one day, you too will be able to say "I have Lyme Disease." It will roll off your tongue like "My name is Jennifer." As my new friend and I discussed last night, it's almost like an AA meeting. "Hi My name is Jennifer and I have Lyme Disease."

2010 in Review

2010 had some ups and downs. I was supposed to have written this by now. Apparently, I've been slack. I scheduled it to post today figuring I'd have it completed. I only completed 2 months. Oh well. Here ya go.

January of 2010 One year ago I was given the best news: Concerns for Lyme Disease: And I quote, "No further treatment should be needed at this time." Of course I was also told to be conscious of risk for relapse.

We also enjoyed my birthday with some really extra sweet cake ~ the cake Debacle of 2010

The almost birthday snow.

February of 2010

In Feb of 2010, we got snow at least twice. In fact, I risked my life for my children.

And at the Alumni Game, it started to snow while we were there. I almost fell a couple of times and gripped onto him for dear life. But, seriously a great time was had by all. Alumni Game with my best friend at UNC.

Then we found the list of symptoms I had in 2006. It's amazing to think how sick I was almost five years ago.





IN 2009

In 2008

Pain

Just because I don't complain about it doesn't mean it's not there. I learned a long time ago how to cope with Lyme pain (without medication too). However, I've pretty much been down and out since yesterday at waking time. It feels like someone is taking a knife and jabbing into my brain. I thought eventually it would improve, but finally decided to take Tylenol. Figured it would help. I figured wrong. It still feels like someone is jabbing my brain with a knife.

Top it off with a lot of back pain and stomach cramps, I'm pretty bad shape today. I know part of it is that lovely visit from my monthly friend. In fact, MOST of it is the visit from my monthly friend. However working 80 hours over the last 2 weeks hasn't helped. I really haven't worked 80 hours in 2 weeks in YEARS. I typically work at most 6 hours a day. Sometimes with an 8 hour thrown here or there. However over the last 4 weeks, I've worked many 9 hour days each week. My body feels like it's going to die and soon. I was even limping when I stood up after sitting to feed a baby. Of course I get asked, "What's wrong?" I want to scream, "I still have it. It doesn't just go away. I just have learned how to cope with it and most days I'm pretty fine." Instead I say, "I'm fine." I walk out of the room and try to cope with it better before I walk into the next room. Next week I have two 9.25 hour days scheduled. BACK TO BACK. This has happened the last few weeks. Last week I was actually not scheduled for this, but it happened when we had too many teachers call out sick.

So now it leaves me down & out for the weekend. I have to try to pull myself back together for tomorrow. It's a short day tomorrow unless someone calls out.

To David

I have been emailing with you about your wife. I have been trying to respond for the last week or so. However for some reason, my internet browser crashes whenever I reply to your messages. So I thought I would respond here out in the open so that you would know I wasn't ignoring your messages.

I did both the High Dose IV Vitamin C and IV Glutathione. I didn't do "shots." I did full on IV's. Typically took 3 hours when I did straight out IV's, but it took less time when I had my PICC line. I believe those two things were huge in my recovery process. Now while I am not feeling 100 percent, I am working 35 to 40 hours a week and not sleeping my days away. I used to sleep a LOT more. While my friends think I'm insane for going to bed at 7:30 or 8pm, what they may not realize is that I used to nap every afternoon for 3 to 4 hours only to get up for food and then go back to bed by 7pm. Some people don't respond by the Vitamin C and Glutathione, but I did.

Hope this helps David.

XXXV

I've decided that XXXV sounds much younger than 35. Am I right?

Had a blast today. For the past 2o or so days, I've had this running count down with a friend at work. In December, she randomly blurted out that it was so many days until her birthday and that she expected a gift. She said it once and only once. So the day after her birthday (she took her actual birthday off), I showed up to work with an ornament that I made with her name on it. Well I randomly one day told her, "Hey it's 21 days until my birthday, I expect a present." I grinned and went on about my business. Then around day 14, I said it each and every day. I even mentioned it in statuses on Facebook on the weekends. I said it at different times each day and it was so random. Near the ends, it got groans from anyone that was near which made me laugh.

Today, she brought me my gift. A button that said "Happy Birthday." :o) I had to wear it all day long.

Rob made me a birthday cake again. It turned out much better than last year (though I haven't eaten it yet). We went out to eat at my fave T.G.I.Fridays. Ate way too much, got embarrassed with their birthday song and had a great time. The look on the dude's face when I told him I was "XXXV" was priceless. I don't think he'd ever have anyone tell him their age in roman numerals before!

I got tons of birthday wishes and I had a great great XXXVth birthday. :)

Master Bedroom

Only thing it needs is a new coat of paint. Oh what am I saying .. it needs paint in the first place. We've painted all of TWO rooms in our house since 1998. One is the bathroom and the other is the computer room.

Anyways: Here's our "new" bedroom!



You can see our new curtains, new runner on the dresser, our new duvet cover & the pillow cases are part of our new sheet set. We purchased the ceiling fan over the summer when our old one went out. The picture on the wall I received for Christmas many many moons ago. When we first got married, we had a frame for our mattresses and that was it. It bothered me quite a bit. Scratch that, quite a lot.

I knew I didn't want "light" wood and preferably wanted a darker wood. I really wanted some iron of some sort in it, but in the end decided that simpler was better because I might not like the iron look in 10 years. We ordered a non-sleigh bed because the dimensions on the website. We knew it wouldn't fit our bedroom even though we really wanted the sleigh bed. Well when the bed arrived, it was the one we wanted (but didn't order) AND it fit the room. We called the place to let them know of the mistake, but told them we wanted to keep the one sent. Now if we could get the room painted, I'd be pleased as punch. :o)

The top of the dresser. I use table runners to cover my dresser so that it protects the wood a little bit from anything I might put on top of the dresser. For about 8 years, we used a Burgundy Comforter so our runner was Burgundy. Our second most recent purchased changed the color theme to the light teal green blue, but I finally got around to buying a new runner after the most recent duvet cover was purchased.

Preview

Our nightstands. We've had these lamps forever. I still love them as much as the first day we bought them. What's on my nightstand? A Lamp, A Clock that I keep facing towards me. Yes that is MY side of the bed. Also keep a telephone (which has a silent ringer!) and what you can't see because I hid it in the top drawer is the remote control for the fan/light. Yes I can crawl into bed and then turn off the light! It's wonderful.

The most wonderful invention ever because I don't have to remove my glasses, fumble to the light switch, turn off lights, fumble back to bed and get in. I just have to crawl into bed. Get comfortable and turn off the lights and then remove my glasses. It's on a dimmer turn off so turns off in a way that I can remove my glasses and scootch down in bed before it's completely off. LOVE IT! Also just like I use table runner on my dresser, I get place mats for the nightstands. You can see just how ginormous they are based on how much tiny the place mats look.

Once it's painted, I will be LOVING this room.

And yes, our closet is still clean! Must be a record for me.

Ultimate Present II

So as I was saying yesterday, I am very cold natured. My old comforter shrank to the size of a waffle and my birthday is coming up. So after much discussion, we decided to go comforter looking. I had grand visions of matching the "new" comforter with curtains so that we wouldn't have to get new ones, but alas finding a comforter we both liked would find difficult. Finding one that matched the curtains that we weren't particularly fond of anymore would prove impossible.

I must first stay that Kmart isn't a shop we visit often, but I have discovered that if I need shoes or comforters it is the place to at least take a peek. They have comforters out the wazoo and have small sized shoes (5, 5 & 1/2 ladies which is very hard to find in a lot of stores). So instead of starting off at Target, we decided to start at Kmart. As our luck would have it, Kmart had NOTHING that we liked at all. Well that's a lie becuase there were two that kind of peaked our interest. But one was kind of uncomfortable feeling (which is a definite no no) and the other well it would have worked, but I thought there was something better. :)

So onto Target we went. (No you know if we had gone to Target first, we wouldn't have found a thing there right?). We venture down the first aisle. Then the second and right about the time we get to the second aisle, my husband says something very interesting. Now at home we have this very WHITE down comforter. It's extremely comfortable, but not very attractive. I mean if you're going for stark white, it's perfect. So back to what he said or rather what he hinted at. He suggested that we might be able to find a duvet cover for this crazy comfortable stark white down comforter. Now this is what we had intended originally, but never found one in our price point that matched our style. (aka expensive tastes = expensive price point).

As we're turning the corner, I see something that I loved. I thought to self, "Self if only they had a comforter in THIS. It's soooo pretty, but even if they do ... I bet it's close to 200 bucks!." I looked anyways. Then I realized that the pretty thang ... that I thought was a sheet set, was indeed a duvet cover. I thought we had hit the lottery. I knew I was going to ignore this lovely style and keep on going once I saw it so I looked quickly at the price. Keep in mind that when we went to K-mart, they had all these bed in a bags on sale for 49.99 that were typically a 99.99 price point. So we were hoping for that kind of price point. I looked once. I did a double take. This beautiful wonderful delight that looked so perfect was only 52.99!

At this point, I show to the husband. ;) He thinks it's perfect too. Except we hadn't felt the thing. What if it felt like the one at Kmart that was sort of okay, but felt horrible. So we unzipped the package and stuck a hand in. AWWWWWWWWWWWWW it was like the heavens opened up and sang for us. This is stock photo from Amazon's website, but here is the duvet cover. We did NOT pick up the Shams. We've never been big sham people as it seems like all they are there for is to throw in the floor to sleep at night (and then I never have the energy to put them back on the bed the next morning so they stay there ... FOR MONTHS!) I'm hoping that Rob can take that kind of taupe color and pain the walls. If he does, you'll definitely get pictures! :) BTW: Bed didn't really match curtains that we hated anyways so we picked up two panel curtains that were very plain. WE like them, but we need to get valance so it doesn't look as bare. Once the walls are painted, it will look 100 percent better.

The Ultimate Present

I'm a cold natured person. VERY cold natured. If I could, I'd use the electric blanket in the summer! Well a few years ago, we purchased a new comforter with curtains to match. As much as I LOVED them, there were two big problems. The first time we washed the new comforter, it shrank. It barely covered the top of the bed. AND the curtains (valance part). Well they presented a whole new problem. It was barely noticeable to anyone other than us. Let's be honest, we're the only ones in our bedroom ever anyways. However, our window needed 2 valances. One of the valances had FOUR stripes of cream and the other Valance had FIVE stripes of cream. So it made the one with five stripes just a hair longer than the other one.


Stay tuned for what I got for my birthday that's coming up. I'm so stoked!

Inspired

My closet inspired me to work on my dresser and chest of drawers. I haven't fallen off the face of the planet. I promise.

The Phenomenal Closet

Rob's shirts.


Our pants.

My Shirts (and dresses and skirts)



Isn't it phenomenal?

Still alive

I'm still living. I just have been focused on other things. One of those things is getting my home back in order. Today I focused on our master bedroom closet. Purchased new hangers (I was so done with those white plastic hangers) with some Christmas money and spent today throwing things away from the closet. Sad to say I threw away something that I've had since I was probably 11 years old! *gasp* How this item managed to go from house to house to dorm to house to dorm house to dorm house to dorm to house is beyond me. There are a few more clothing items that I really should get rid of, but for some reason I keep holding on.

Probably share pictures soon.

Review soon

I had planned on posting a full on 2010 review today, but I haven't been feeling good today. I work a really long shift tomorrow too so in liklihood the review won't happen tomorrow either.

So Long 2010

Lots of things happened in 2010. Some of those things gave me tremendous joys. Some that caused tremendous pains, both physically and emotionally.

So Long 2010, Hello to 2011.

For those of you that will be watching the Rose Bowl Parade ... you will have the opportunity to see Western Carolina University's Marching Band. They are awesome on the field and I can't wait to see them on the television. I believe that HGTV has the parade commercial free. It's 8am PST (so for all of us on the Eastern coast that's 11am). I believe they are number 48 in the line up. Can't wait to see my Pride of the Mountains Marching Band!

Frosty the Snowman

Is a very leaning soul.

Poor Frosty.

Still snowing

So far we've had about 15 hours of snow. That's crazy. Here's a picture from noonish.



Most of the time North Carolina's snow isn't good enough for snowman building. Today's snow was perfect for building snowmen.

Almost White Christmas 2

I took this one to remind me later that it was during the Christmas days that we saw this snow. It is just pouring down. The plows can't get the roads clear before it's snowed over again. It's state wide pretty much. Fortunately I don't even have to worry about going to work tomorrow because I already have the day off. So I won't be waking up at 3am to see if they've made a call about work. I don't think this one will disappear any time soon unlike the other 4 snows we've had this season alone. I call those snows, but itw as more like snow for an hour and then ice for the rest of the time causing all the snow to be gone by teh time the precip stopped. Go to the last post to see a comparison of 5:30 am to 7:30am.

well it was close

By looking at the radar, it started snowing here at midnight. So for me, there was no white Christmas. BUT, the day after is pretty close. AND it did snow at the airport in Raleigh well before Midnight so it counts. The triangle had a white Christmas even if I didn't. So I think it's been snowing for about five hours. If my calculations are correct, there is about 8 more hours of snow. We'll see.

For now ... this is what we have.



7:30 am - a mere two hours later.



9:45am

Waiting for a White Christmas

A few days ago, the weather forecasters predicted a White Christmas (SNOW) for the Triangle for the first time since like the 1940's. Crazy thing is that I do remember having a White Christmas in 1997, but that part of NC isn't considered the Triangle (aka the airport didn't get snow that day). And I can't remember if it actually precipitated that day or if twas the day before Christmas. Either way, It just might snow today. My county is predicted to receive 4 to 6 inches of snow. It completely changes my plans for tomorrow. Our family has a reunion the Sunday after Christmas every year. As a child, we often went. The memories of this reunion are a cherished part of my life. Playing Pinball with my cousins, whining over having to listen to Achy Breaky Heart yet again and eating my Granny's infamous mac & cheese and of course the elder folks saying with gusto how much we had all grown over the past year.

This is the first year without my cherished Grandfather. We had planned to go partake in the reunion. I wasn't going to take Granny's infamous mac & cheese (it takes almost 4 hours to get there), but I did plan on whining about Achy Breaky Heart and kicking my "lil" (who is now very big!) cousin's butt in Pinball. Oh wait, maybe not b.c now the younger generation has taken over the pinball machine.

Looks like Bing will finally get what he wants in the Triangle. A White Christmas.