So Long 2010

Lots of things happened in 2010. Some of those things gave me tremendous joys. Some that caused tremendous pains, both physically and emotionally.

So Long 2010, Hello to 2011.

For those of you that will be watching the Rose Bowl Parade ... you will have the opportunity to see Western Carolina University's Marching Band. They are awesome on the field and I can't wait to see them on the television. I believe that HGTV has the parade commercial free. It's 8am PST (so for all of us on the Eastern coast that's 11am). I believe they are number 48 in the line up. Can't wait to see my Pride of the Mountains Marching Band!

Frosty the Snowman

Is a very leaning soul.

Poor Frosty.

Still snowing

So far we've had about 15 hours of snow. That's crazy. Here's a picture from noonish.



Most of the time North Carolina's snow isn't good enough for snowman building. Today's snow was perfect for building snowmen.

Almost White Christmas 2

I took this one to remind me later that it was during the Christmas days that we saw this snow. It is just pouring down. The plows can't get the roads clear before it's snowed over again. It's state wide pretty much. Fortunately I don't even have to worry about going to work tomorrow because I already have the day off. So I won't be waking up at 3am to see if they've made a call about work. I don't think this one will disappear any time soon unlike the other 4 snows we've had this season alone. I call those snows, but itw as more like snow for an hour and then ice for the rest of the time causing all the snow to be gone by teh time the precip stopped. Go to the last post to see a comparison of 5:30 am to 7:30am.

well it was close

By looking at the radar, it started snowing here at midnight. So for me, there was no white Christmas. BUT, the day after is pretty close. AND it did snow at the airport in Raleigh well before Midnight so it counts. The triangle had a white Christmas even if I didn't. So I think it's been snowing for about five hours. If my calculations are correct, there is about 8 more hours of snow. We'll see.

For now ... this is what we have.



7:30 am - a mere two hours later.



9:45am

Waiting for a White Christmas

A few days ago, the weather forecasters predicted a White Christmas (SNOW) for the Triangle for the first time since like the 1940's. Crazy thing is that I do remember having a White Christmas in 1997, but that part of NC isn't considered the Triangle (aka the airport didn't get snow that day). And I can't remember if it actually precipitated that day or if twas the day before Christmas. Either way, It just might snow today. My county is predicted to receive 4 to 6 inches of snow. It completely changes my plans for tomorrow. Our family has a reunion the Sunday after Christmas every year. As a child, we often went. The memories of this reunion are a cherished part of my life. Playing Pinball with my cousins, whining over having to listen to Achy Breaky Heart yet again and eating my Granny's infamous mac & cheese and of course the elder folks saying with gusto how much we had all grown over the past year.

This is the first year without my cherished Grandfather. We had planned to go partake in the reunion. I wasn't going to take Granny's infamous mac & cheese (it takes almost 4 hours to get there), but I did plan on whining about Achy Breaky Heart and kicking my "lil" (who is now very big!) cousin's butt in Pinball. Oh wait, maybe not b.c now the younger generation has taken over the pinball machine.

Looks like Bing will finally get what he wants in the Triangle. A White Christmas.

Family Christmas

So our home was once again gifted by the "Redneck Wrapper." This time the Redneck Wrapper wrapped in the used bag of popcorn. Inside the bag of popcorn was a present carefully wrapped in a Food Lion bag covered by paper towels. Once I got through the butter covered paper towels and into the food lion bag, I opened up the present by my brother in which the Redneck Wrapper hijacked. It was three boxes of toothpicks. Yeah we're crazy like that.



It was shortly after in which I was gifted with the annual gift Gummy Saver, a bag of Gummy Savers. It often results in this facial expression.




Once I suggested the theme was "bags," I gave my brother this look when I saw that he had given me a box of baggies for Christmas.



And if you look in the floor, you'll see a lunch "bag" and a Carolina "bag." This theme apparently was not intentional. In fact, it was only after I pointed out the "bag theme" after the third gift was a bag of something that each gift was funnier and funnier eliciting great responses like this one ....



After this, I got a bag of Munchos from "your facebook friend."



I had a wonderful time with my family on Christmas Eve Squared. I got lots of beautiful things including a wonderful ornament hand made by my mother, actually there were two. One was of my favorite Tar Heel basketball player and the other had photographs of my grandparents with me. Also received a lovely bath wrap which included was a bag to put it in to wash. I received lots of beautiful things, but most of all ... beautiful memories to cherish for the years to come.

*Snow Day*

So while most of the schools and child care centers were either closed or delayed today, ours was not. I made it to work and back just fine. Only slipped on my way to work this morning.


Unfortunately, I didn't get a photo of the beautiful snow this morning. After the snow changed into sleet/mixed wintry precip, the snow "melted" away. So now it's just a soggy mess out there. As the temp drops, the water will freeze. I wasn't scared this morning to drive to work.

I'll be terrified tomorrow morning though.

Prayer request for a friend

I had intended to write about what I learned on my last follow up appointment. Then I found out something.

My college friend sent me a message asking if I had heard about our mutual college friend. Well you see the thing is, I've been friends with this mutual friend since the first day of 7th grade. My heart hit my stomach as I learn a few details. The thing you must know is that my friend and her husband have been trying to have a baby since they got married. After years, they finally succeeded (with doctor's help). In November (about a month ago), she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. Yesterday morning, her husband was off to work. He hit a patch of black ice and his truck rolled. He's alive. He has no brain injury. However, the wreck gave him severe injuries and he is paralyzed from the waist down. Doctors say that with surgery there is only a 1 to 2 percent chance that he'll move again.

We all know what prayers can do. Please pray for this family. A new Mom, a newborn son and his father. Pray for all of us in North Carolina that can't be with them physically because they live far away. I miss my friend and wishes she were here at least 3 times a week. There isn't a week that goes by that I don't think, I wish she were here so I could tell her about ... I don't get to see her often, but when I do ... it's as if no time had passed at all. My stomach churns for what has happened to her husband. Pray for his healing, pray for her understanding and for their beautiful baby.

I would share names, but some of our friends do not know this has happened yet. I would hate for them to see this on a blog before hearing about it on the telephone. Also I did not get permission from my friend to post this prayer request though I know she will appreciate that I have done so.

First snow of the season

I'm sure it won't stick, but our house has seen the first snow of the season.

December 4th. :o)

I can't get a good picture of it yet, but if I do will be sure to post it here later.

follow up

It's follow up time. I go in tomorrow for my follow up. This will be the first time in years that I dont' have my blood results before I go in. I have no clue what the LLMD will say to me tomorrow. I have a sneaking suspicion that my blood work won't look good though.

I've enjoyed my time to myself this week.

(ps. never did write about this follow up - but it was a good visit. the words possible remission was used briefly)

Time for myself

So my job comes with a few perks. One of those perks is vacation and sick time. It's not a whole lot of time, but I typically use it when I have doctor's appointments. Well this year, I didn't have as many doctor's appointment which meant that I had about 60 hours of vacation time left that I had to use or I would lose. So the past couple of weeks I've taken time off here and there, but it still would have left me with 40 hours of time that I would lose. So I made the decision to use a full week after Thanksgiving! This means I'd have 11 days off work in a row since we were closed the day of Thanksgiving and the day after. I have seriously enjoyed (minus the bronchitis) this time to myself. I've put up and decorated the tree, wrapped presents and just kind of relaxed watching Christmas movies.

Well yesterday I got the urge. I typically don't get this particular urge. In fact, I leave the creativity to my Dad. I took off to Michaels and picked up a few things and I'm covered in paint, ribbon and bells. My kitchen table looks like my parent's kitchen table this time of year. :O (No Offense Dad)

Anyways, it's been fun. :o) Minus the coughing, I'm feeling pretty good.

Blood Work

Woke up at 5am to start prepping for my blood work this morning at 8am. Slick got it in one stick. Crazy thing is that here it is ... 5 hours later and I am still bleeding. This is unusual so I suspect that my blood work will be all wonky (platelets low or something like that).

Go for a follow up on Saturday.

No Herxing!!!

So one thing that is a little frightening for a Lyme patient (post major treatment) is to be treated with an antibiotic. I guess I can't say this for all Lyme patients, but for me ... I worry that there will be a Herx reaction. This is the reaction that occurs when large amounts of toxins are released into the body as bacteria die during antibiotic treatment. I've pretty much avoided anything stronger than Amoxil since my Lyme treatment. In fact, I've pretty much even avoided it by taking IV Vitamin C when I felt it was getting close to antibiotic time.

I've had both a Penicillin type medicine and a Macrolide and ... guess what folks ... no herx reaction! I've had a little pain in my back, but the pain could be attributed to how much I've been coughing. This sure beats the "Oh My, I'm about ready to die from all these bacteria dying" feeling. I really feel that I have this sucker beat. I mean sure I have a weak immune system due to this sucker and sure there are many other things going on in my body thanks to dear old Lyme ... BUT the fact that I am not herxing during antibiotic treatment for Bronchitis ... means that I am in fact, getting better!

(even though I'm still coughing up a lung or two due to the Bronchitis)

Today is the last day of antibiotic. Hopefully, I'll start feeling better. I should know by Wednesday if Zithromax took care of it or not.

Bronchitis

The whole reason I went to the doctor on November 2nd was to prevent Bronchitis. I knew that if I kept that infection any longer that the bacteria would travel on down to my lungs and well I'd be feeling like an elephant was sitting on my chest.

After finishing my antibiotics, I didn't have a long period of "health" before I got sick again. The lovely stomach flu hit and after it departed from my body, I got a small cough. It wasn't that bad, but along with the cough I felt the urge to clear my throat. Within a few hours of the onset of coughing, I began to feel it. It hurt to breathe. My lungs felt wet and heavy. This was all on Monday evening. I was hoping that by Tuesday I'd feel better, but to no avail. Then Wednesday morning I felt even worse. It was a chore just to breathe and I struggled to catch my breath after coughing spells.

So I made the decision to go to the doctor's after work. I called my PCP (Primary Care Physician) to see if they by chance had any sick appointments available. TO my surprise, they did with the caveat being they needed me there in the next hour. I got there 30 minutes before my appointment time and expected that I would have a huge wait in the waiting room or in the exam room. However, that is not what happened at all. I had enough time to fill out the paperwork and shortly after I was called back. I had enough time to have 3 coughing spells before the doctor came in commenting on how wonderful I sounded.

I told him of my ailments over the last couple of months and he listened to my lungs. The words crackling and wheezing were mentioned a couple of times. He went to get a sample inhaler so I could get started on treatment right away, but they were out of samples. Indeed, I had Bronchitis. He faxed over the script for Zithromax and the Inhaler I'd need. I've had one dose of the antibiotic (it's a one dose a day for 5 days macrolide). This morning I woke up without a sore throat for the first time in a few days!

I've also had my hand at the inhaler on two different occasions. Once last night as soon as it got home and this morning. My lungs feel so much lighter and I'm actually coughing stuff up without the use of an expectorant. Delsym seems to be working to keep the coughing controlled.

Funny thing is that my blood work was postponed a few weeks so I would be away from antibiotics when the blood was done. Now, my blood work is on Tuesday ... So I'll have antibiotics and Albuterol in my system. Oh well. It will be interesting to see what the blood work says.

My guess is that the Amoxil didn't knock out the infection completely. So it festered and festered and then reappeared immediately as Bronchitis.

Fun House Glasses

I received the phone call that my glasses had arrived on Thursday. I was excited to get the call, but then was disappointed to find out my optical adjuster wouldn't be in until Monday. I decided to be patient because my optical adjuster never fails. Then I wound up puking my guts up a few hours later so I was glad I waited.

Anyways, Monday afternoon I drove up to the eye care place only to discover that my favorite lady was not in after all. I was disappointed, but decided to place trust in the optical lady that was there. I put on the new glasses and immediately felt a touch of motion sickness. Things were magnified and distorted. She made a few adjustments and sent me on my way. I wore them for five hours when I had to take them off. Everything was too tall and too wide ... I couldn't take it. Something was off. Really off. They told me though before I left to come back around 1 the next day and my favorite lady would be there.

So I made a special trip up there (it's about 20 minutes from my house and almost an hour from work) on Tuesday and got there at 1 on the dot. Then I saw a sign that wasn't there the day before, "Closed from 1 to 2:30 for training!." I have to be honest. I was very upset. Here I was, not feeling well and I had to wait 90 minutes to be seen. Decided to use the opportunity to walk around the few stores in the area and wasted 90 minutes in well .. 90 minutes.

I went back in to see my favorite lady and she was thrilled to see me, but disappointed to see me in my old frames. I told her about my magnification and motion sickness problem. She took them to the back. She put them under her fancy machine. I could see her perplexed look .. her I'm going to fix this look and then her I'm now cleaning the lens look. She came back out and said "how's this?" I put them on my face and the motion sickness feeling was much better.

Turns out that the Axis was off in the left lens. Then she explained to me that in my right eye, the astigmatism had changed by "one click." That is what made everything appear bigger and a little distorted. Then the axis problem in the left lens caused even more distortion and the combination caused major motion sickness. She spent a good 20 minutes working on the position of the glasses (nosepads and ear pieces). I had to go back again today ... and by the way they feel tonight ... I'll be back on Friday. I waste so much gasoline trying to get my new glasses adjusted.

I still have a little distortion, but it's a typical amount of distortion as my brain and eyes learn to use the new prescription. Next on Living the Lyme Life my recent diagnosis ....

1. Sinus Infection (November 2nd)
2. Stomach Flu (November 18th)
3. Bronchitis (November 24th)

Fun House Glasses

There's not enough time this morning to write about my day of Fun House Glasses, but be prepared to come back here later on for my adventures in new glasses.

Never ending Illness

I sit here not really knowing whether to laugh or cry. I'm sick of being sick. I'm sick of talking about being sick. I have been fighting illness since the early days of October. We're nearing the end of November! I've been somewhat concerned, but until today (well ugh really 'last night') I wasn't alarmed because it's starting again -- already.

Back up to September where I began to have an allergic reaction to something. We still aren't sure what caused the reaction, but needless to say I wound up at Urgent Care getting something I certainly avoid at all cost -- Steroid Shot. Also took home a round of Steroids to take at home too. I must have been glutton for punishment. Here I am two months later and I realize that it must be the catylist (sp).

In early October, I began to fight off the common cold. I fought it off dutifully with Vitamin C, Zinc, Magic drops and even some OTC medications. I could feel nasal drainage in the back of my throat and had sore throats due to this. I also had small headaches. I did the best I could until October 24th when it hit me like a 2x4. Within 3 days, I had a fever and excess nasal drainage coming out of the nostrils. It was the beautiful green color that nurses used to say indicated infection. In order to prevent another trip to Urgent Care, I scheduled an IV appointment. You all know how that went, but let's recap -- shall we?

On the Friday I went in and got stuck twice over a three hour period, but wound up going home with no IV's. I went back on Saturday and got the IV. All was right in my world -- so I thought. I woke up the next day realizing I hadn't pushed out the infection ... in fact I was worse. I dosed myself up with OTC meds and went to work hoping I'd be able to leave early. That was a no go for launch however. That night, my boss told me I could stay home and rest since I had been feeling so terrible. I used this time to run to the nearest Urgent Care. They prescribed Amoxicillin and all was right with the world -- so I thought. I took this for the amount of time and slowly felt better. I thought about asking my Lyme doc for something else, but I was feeling better so I decided to hold off. November 12th was the last day of my antibiotic and I was doing well (or so I thought).

A few days later, I started feeling a little bit off. I couldn't explain it really, but I did have a headache. By November 17th, I felt a touch of vertigo and of course that's the day of the infamous puking incident(s). We all know what happened there and I won't rehash (pun intended) that one again. So fastforward to today (well by now .. yesterday). I felt pretty good at work. No particular problems, but I did notice that my lungs felt heavy. However, they had been feeling that way since the vomiting commenced. So I *assumed* that it was from that.

Well around 6pm, I started getting a little tickle in my throat. I thought ,hmm that's odd, and went on my way. By 8pm, I was coughing to the point where I decided to take old trusty (well new reliable) Delsym so I'd sleep. (you see where that got me). I honestly feel like I either have another bout of Bronchitis OR Pneumonia. SERIOUSLY? Can't I just get well? (and some rest would be good too)

I'm going to go trodge off to bed feeling the heaviness in my lungs. And you know it's Thanksgiving Week ... I pretty much refuse to go to Urgent Care for the third or fourth time in 2 months and regular PCP is booked up and so is Lyme doc. I go for blood work in one week and my Lyme appt the Saturday afterwards. I've also sent my doc a letter similiar to this post.

Either way ... I just want to get well. AND STAY THAT WAY.

Vomiting and Blogging and TMI

Gross post ahead ... TMI ... if you don't want to read it .. skip it .. I'm warning you.

Okay one might blog too much when in the process of cleaning up the bathroom from one own's stomach contents ... that I think, "I should photograph this .. this is MASSIVE."

You can thank me now that I didn't photograph the magnitude of said explosion. It is only now there in my memory. It took THREE old towels to clean up the bathroom floor. Along with almost a whole roll of TP. The casualties in the explosion were three magazines. The shower curtain got washed along with the bath floor mat and my clothes. The weight scale almost got wiped out. My purse was almost hit in the massive explosion. I don't even know how my shoes were spared in such a mess.

Aren't you glad I didn't take photographs? :D

BTW: I am feeling better today. I'm still very weak from 17 hours of sickness. Oh and my husband can never ever say I didn't give him anything. In November alone, I gave him a sinus infection AND the stomach flu. Isn't he a lucky fellow to be married to me?

For a real Lymie ... Stomach flu = 17 hours of throwing up and more than 48 hours afterwards to recover.

For the husband ... Stomach flu = 4 hours of vomiting, 8 hours of sleeping and now he acts as if nothing ever happened.

SICK

Yesterday I got home and didn't feel well. My stomach was feeling kind of "gnarly" and I thought I was hungry. I had a couple of pieces of salami (in hindsight ... bad choice) and a protein bar and went to go get my hair done. AS I was sitting there, I began to feel worse. My head began to pound. Almost near the end of her styling my hair, I told her I had to leave. I just felt horrible.

I got home ... and a moment that can only be described as the exorcist happened. Then it happened almost every hour for the next 17 hours. Fever, Vomiting and Diahrea. Gah I feel awful. I'm dehydrated, but I am starting to feel better. I've not gotten sick in about 6 hours though I still feel nauseated.

It's going around at work (the kids and other teachers) so once the first round hit, I knew I was in for it. So I called the boss to find out if she'd prefer I just go ahead and call out (which I never do) or if she wanted me to wait and see if it was just what I ate. She told me to call her in a couple of hours, but in about an hour she called me saying she found someone to cover my shift. I'm so thankful for the teacher that was willing to cover for me b.c I was still pretty sick this morning when I was supposed to go to work.

Ugh. Sinus infections and Stomach Flu all in the month.

Thanksful Tuesday

Today I find myself thankful for something. I find myself thankful for this one thing often actually.

I am thankful for my friends. My TRUE friends. The Friends that get me on a deeper level. They know what I'm thinking before I'm even thinking it.

It's just nice to have people that know me that well.

See Saw

I went to the eye doctor today for my vision test. Did I pass? Yes & No. :)

The past few weeks I have been having pretty terrible headaches. I half thought it was change in vision and half thought it was the sinus infection. As the infection improved and my headache did not, I realized that more than likely my vision had changed at least slightly. And yes, each eye changed just slightly. So new lenses have been ordered. My insurance won't pay for new frames, but I ordered some anyways because my current pair are scratched. I'm hoping that by Thanksgiving I'll be sporting a new look and that within a few days of getting them that the headache will be no more.

*someone asked about my prescription. Actually I have no clue. I never pay attention to the numbers. If I remember, I'll ask my optical consultant when I go into pick them up.

Sick Check In

Remember when I said, '"Well if it "may" cause drowsiness, it might as well say "WILL" cause "sleep for 1/2 day."'


Well last night I started having some eye itching and swelling. It happens (more often than I care to admit). So I decided to take the Delsym Night Time cough syrup with antihistamine. Well the typical adult dose is 30ML. I poured it into the dosing cup and decided that it looked like it could knock me out for a good 30 hours so I poured 15 ML back into the bottle leaving me with only 15 ML to take. I took it at 8:30 and was asleep by 8:45. I didn't budge until 9:30 .... THIS MORNING. If you take into account last night was the end of Day Lights Savings time, I slept for 13 and 1/2 hours on 1/2 a dose. I can't imagine if I had taken the full dose.

Anyways, I do feel better. :) I'm still on antibiotics. I've only had three bouts of running to the bathroom. I was supposed to have blood work on this coming Wednesday, but we pushed it back to the week after Thanksgiving since there are several factors that could really affect the blood work results. I go get my eyes checked on Tuesday. I imagine that in about 2 1/2 weeks I'll be sporting new glasses.

Getting there!

With each passing day, I feel a little bit better. On Wednesday and Thursday, people kept recommending to me to try a little cough syrup I had never even heard of. Where do I live? The Dark ages?



This stuff is liquid gold man! Thursday I was coughing so bad to the point of almost puking. And by almost ... I mean (TMI alert!) something came up and I was forced to swallow or I would have vomited in my car. And for those of you that know me, know that I LOVE my car! I was in tears from coughing so hard Thursday evening. I told my husband about this stuff and the trooper he was went out after his work event to get me some. When I woke (from very little sleep from all the coughing), I discovered three bottles of the stuff. One for Day time relief and Two for Night time relief. The thing is .. the Day Time stuff works so well, that I didn't even need to use the Night time stuff (b.c it has three other meds in it that I didn't really need last night).

I actually have a difficult time trying new medicines because I'm terribly sensitive to things. You know the side effect list of things ... if one says "MAY cause drowsiness." Well if it "may" cause drowsiness, it might as well say "WILL" cause "sleep for 1/2 day." Things that don't even say "may cause drowsiness" cause me drowsiness. Sometimes when I take Tylenol, I sleep for hours! Plus lately, I've been having weird allergic reaction to things. Example is that the other day I had a fever so I took Motrin and it caused my eyes to swell. I'd say who is allergic to Motrin, but I know a lot of people are allergic to different fever reducing meds. It's just weird that I haven't had a problem in 34 years and all the sudden I am ...

Anyways, Delsym has been wonderful. I took it before going to work yesterday. I only had one major coughing spell instead of a continuous coughing spell I had been having. I took it again last night before bed. I slept all night soundly.

On the antibiotic front, I've been taking Amoxil since Tuesday evening. It's really starting to work. My nasal passages are pretty clear and my nose is no longer running like a faucet. And you know that lovely post nasal drip that causes serious sore throat? Yah that's disappearing too. The antibiotics have only given me one round of bathroom runs (PUN intended) after dose 3.

As far as I can tell, I'm not really having any herx reaction. The only thing really "off" was that yesterday I felt like a complete moron ~ like washing my hands and turning around and washing them again ... or throwing bibs in the trash instead of the laundry or even being baffled as to why formula wouldn't come out of the bottle when I've used this type of bottles many times (it had a stopper in it .. DUH!). It added some humor to the class yesterday. In my defense, the others were just as stupid yesterday. We kept teasing each other all day about "How old are you?" (indicating that we were in our 90's instead of in our 30's).

I've been enjoying helping out at the other school. I'm feeling very appreciated (not that I don't feel appreciated where I already work) by the teachers. The teachers want me to stay on permanently. I haven't made a decision. I love both schools. Each school has it's pro and con. For right now, I'm splitting my time between the two schools.

The friend that won't leave

So I've had this cough since Sunday. I've pretty much coughed non-stop since. I'm surviving though. I've had 4 doses of Antibiotics and only had round of stomach problems. I call that a success. :o) I'm hoping that by Saturday I'll be feel tons better. Even though I sound terrible and the cough just doesn't want to leave, I actually do feel better today than I have since Thursday. So I'm heading in the right direction.

Amos The Amoxy

Usually when I leave the Urgent Care, I remember why I hate regular physicians. This was a P.A and I was very impressed. He even asked me what generally worked best with my bacterial infections. I told him usually either Amoxil or Zithromax and that I preferred a suspension. He was very willing to write it for Amoxil and to write it out for a suspension without question. I'll be taking 1200 mg of Amoxicillin twice a day for 10 days for a total of 2.4 grams a day. If I'm remembering correctly, the typical adult gets between 500 mg and 875 mg twice a day.


I don't remember what my dosing was when I took Amoxil with other antibiotics for Lyme Disease, but 400mg/5ml is the largest dose in a suspension form. I just don't recall how many ML's I took. Usually day one and two go okay, it's days three and four on antibiotics post Lyme diagnosis that are the killer. Just wanted to give a good update not only for you guys, but for me to remember later on. :)

So the P.A. said that generally what happens is that people get a small virus that they fight off on their own in about 5 days. Since my symptoms have been going on for about 10 days, it has mutated into a bacterial infection. This is typically what happens in my case. However if I get the Vitamin C IV quickly enough, it helps kill off the small virus so that it doesn't change into the bacterial infection.

There is a small chance that I'll have a herx reaction due to the antibiotics killing off any Lyme bacteria lingering around in my body. I have blood work on next Wednesday. It will be interesting to see how things look while I'm on antibiotics.

Still sick

**Update since this morning** I know the way my body runs and it was either try to squeeze in yet another IV or go get some antibiotics today. I personally know that Tuesdays are my LLMD's business IV day so I didn't think I'd be able to get squeezed in for one and for two, I wasn't sure they'd be able to get an IV started so I decided to hit the Urgent Care to go ahead and get this infection cleared up. I'm sick of being sick and didn't think I could wait until Saturday to take care of the problem. So Amos the Amoxicillan and I are becoming reacquainted today. I would take it right now, but really the best dosing is at 12 hours. So I'll wait until about 5:30 to take it so I can take it at 5:30 twice a day for 10 days.

**** original post *****

I'm still not running on all 4 cylinders. In fact, I'm running on maybe only 2 of them. Last night, I got a really kind email from my boss. She told me she knew I hadn't been feeling well and offered for me to take today off. I would like to say that I accepted this offer, but it wasn't taken guilt free. I always feel so guilty about taking time away from all my "babies." I feel like I'm letting them down or something of that nature. Truth be told, I need today to be at home curled up in the bed dosed up on otc medications. All my waking moments will be spent wishing I was teaching my kids how to read.

I've passed this lovely germ to my husband who is now more than likely also going to be spending today at home as well. So we both get a day off of work, but more than likely we'll spend it sleeping. When we get sick, he tends to get it in the ears and I get it in the lungs/throat. Last night, he could barely hear and I could barely speak. Makes for quite interesting conversation.

I guess one of the main reasons I feel guilty is that I haven't stepped foot into my school in a week's time. I volunteered to help at another school so I have been there. There was no time to prep the children to let them know I was leaving and that I would be back soon ... I just was gone. I feel so guilty about that. Now it's time to hit the DayQuil and try to get some relief from the symptoms I'm feeling.

PS, hubby has Lyme appt on Saturday. So if I'm still like this, I may try to see if he'll write me a script since I've tried all the other routes.

Polar Opposite

I'm strong or weak.
I'm happy or sad.
I'm patient or frustrated.
I'm healthy or sick.
I'm energized or exhausted.

I can or I can't.
There is no middle ground.
There is no in between.
There is no grey.
It's just black or white.

Mentally and physically I'm wiped out.
Friends are upset because I changed plans.
They just don't understand that
just because I was perfectly fine yesterday doesn't
mean I'm well today.

Case in point, last Saturday I was fine and
was making plans for this weekend.
This weekend I found myself getting
juiced up intravenously with Vitamin C
because by Wednesday I was sick.

I wasn't sick and then four days later, I was.
It isn't quite fair to others. And when
they fuss that I've postponed
it hurts me more than it hurts them.
How do I make them understand?

They just don't get it.
They won't get it.
They pretend they do,
but then act all hurt when
you say, "not today."

I'm strong or weak.
I'm happy or sad.
I'm patient or frustrated.
I'm healthy or sick.
I'm energized or exhausted.

I can or I can't.
There is no middle ground.
There is no in between.
There is no grey.
It's just black or white.

Somewhere in the middle of all of this
someone has got to understand.
Doctors have got to put a stop to the ignorance.
Stop misleading the public
that Lyme is easy to treat.

It's not. I'm living proof.
Here we are 15 years and 2 months later
I'm still struggling to
balance the line between
living a life and living a life with Lyme.

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow.
They all look different.
Yesterday was bad.
Today is okay, but
Tomorrow ....

I'm strong or weak.
I'm happy or sad.
I'm patient or frustrated.
I'm healthy or sick.
I'm energized or exhausted.

I can or I can't.
There is no middle ground.
There is no in between.
There is no grey.
It's just black or white.

Human Pin Cusion 2

My last post inspired me. It inspired me to do this:



and this:



Put it together and you got this:




Yesterday I told you I felt like a Pin Cushion. Well it inspired me. Between my ideas and my husband's genius ... we created my crazy red hat into a pin cushion hat! We turned Rob's white shirt into a "Jennifer the human pin cushion" t-shirt

It made me happy, see ...



You know what else made me happy?

Slick got me in one stick. :) I got my much needed IV today.

Human Pin Cushion

Sometimes I just feel like this

(photo courtesy of: Wikipedia)


I went to go get an IV today. It wasn't successful. I practically left in tears. Between the tourniquet that shouldn't have been used (b.c it was latex) and the pokes in veins that wouldn't accept the IV, I was extreme pain three hours after I walked in. Three hours that I won't get back. In fact, I have to go do this all over again tomorrow. I've decided that two hours is all they get. If they can't get it in two hours, I'll beg for antibiotics and be on my merry way.

It's been one of those days where I feel like ... I'm so tired. I'm tired of the effects of Lyme Disease. I feel like saying Why me .. but then I remember, "Why Not Me?" I think about how much more can I take and then I remember that I can do all things through Christ. I'm tired, but not done. I'll fight this fight. I maybe grumpy, but I'll continue to fight the best I know how. I'm just tired of feeling like a pin cushion.

Come on Immune System

My Immune System is like the Little Engine that Could. It's slowly kicking in and kicking butt too. I feel pretty good today. Low grade fever around lunch time and still have a low grade fever, but I only took Tylenol once today. Minimal sore throat and ear pain. The fatigue is crushing, but ... compared to yesterday I'm in Heaven. I will still be keeping my 10am IV appointment tomorrow.

Immune Function

Update:

I do feel better this morning! My eyes aren't swollen (Yah God & Claritin). My fever is down to a typical person's temp (which is still high for me ... but I'll take it!). My throat isn't as on fire this morning. I'm hoping that my immune system is waking up saying, "Hey there's something here I'm supposed to be fighting" and actually getting the job done. Just to be on the safe side though, I"m taking Vitamin C, Tylenol & Claritin to work ... ya know just in case. :)

****
Original Post:


So there is something I have to be very cautious of. I have to watch out for large crowds and germs. Now as much fun as I had last week, I did do several things that were huge "uh ohs" for me. 1st: Crowd at the State Fair on a Sunday. 2nd: Thursday Night Work event in which I was in small place with lots of people. 3rd: Friday Night Vikings Kick Cancer Game 4th Saturday Marching Band Competition. Then Tuesday: I began helping out at another center with new teachers and new babies ..meaning new germs.

It only makes sense that I'd get sick. I'm feeling quite lousy. High Fever (for me) and sore throat. Not very lovely combination. IV on Friday. Pray for an easy stick.

** Added **

So apparently I've developed an allergy to Motrin. Sometimes I have "delayed" reactions to medications. So two hours after I took the Motrin (aka right now), my eye started itching. I just realized it's quite swollen. The good news is that my fever is down to a normal person's normal. I don't like to take OTC meds. I don't like how they make me feel (more or less most make me sleepy for 12 hours). So within 2 hours ... Motrin, Claritin (to help with the allergy) and .. now my Prescribed meds. I'm going to be conked out shortly .. miss my favorite show. :( I know. It's not the end of the world. But it is the one day a week I stay up until 9. That won't happen today.

Just pray for me regarding the Fever, Sore throat (and now add itchy eyes to that).

Vikings Kick Cancer

They are still calculating the fundraising total for Vikings Kick Cancer, but it was a total success. The competing high school raised almost 1,000 dollars and the feeding middle school brought in about 1,300 dollars. There are a group of tiny cheerleaders (I forget their official name) and they took around jars for cash. During the game, they raised 300 dollars. Who can say no to tiny cheerleaders asking for donations for Breast Cancer Research? Not me.

It was extremely hard to take photos since the game was held at night (obviously). Anyways, here are some photos from the 1st Annual Vikings Kick Cancer Football Game.

All of these are pre-game photos. It was a good hour before the game.






The Vikings wore Pink Jersey's.


The opposing team wore black jerseys and their numbers were outlined in pink. They also wore pink socks. Not the C on all their jerseys too.



These shirts were for sale to raise money for Breast Cancer Research and some people had their own special way to show off their "Pink." See "Twisdale" on the shirt. That was our beloved teacher.



Bunches of Pink Balloons walked by often to hand each individual a balloon or two for release at the start of the game.



Home Side of the game. :)

Fair Fun(k)

So this morning we woke early to head to the North Carolina State Fair. We typically go every 4 years or so and we were just there last year. But, we had so much fun last year (taking photos and looking around) that we decided to go back this year. I found out there was a spot to park for free so that was a bonus too. We get into the fair grounds and I realize right away that our day was not going to be as fun as anticipated. I pulled out my camera to take a photo of something and wham ... I realized that my memory card was at home.

I tried not to really let this bother me, but the only reason I go to the fair is to take pictures and to eat food. :o So we decided to go ahead and get some breakfast. The "good" part of the breakfast was that our biscuit was HOT. We had to wait for quite some time to get our breakfast and the rest was just mediocre. We looked around to find vendors that might would sell memory cards and looked around. We even left the fairgrounds and walked across several roads to by one at the gas station, but .. they didn't have one either! :O I think I found a new vendor market for the Fair! Memory Card Vendor.

So we walked around the flowers and realized we were starting to get hungry. I *love* roasted corn so we walked that way only to realize that it was a cash only place. Guess who had no cash? So we went to the ATM to wait in line. We waited there about 10 minutes only to realize this nice fact: guess who left her purse in the car (on purpose mind you so that I wouldn't have to lug it around) and guess who didn't know the pin number for the ATM tied to my account?

Was I disappointed about the card? yes. Was I disappointed about the money? yes. But, the angry people walking around was starting to rub off. So we decided to leave. We ate at TGIF and came home. Oh well. Guess we won't be going back for a few years .... that and we'll carry an extra memory card in the camera case ... ;)

Here we go again

Can you guess we we are headed by this photo alone?

Vikings Kick Cancer

I wrote this about a week ago, October 22nd: My High School Alma Mater is having this HUGE big deal game! It's a "Vikings Kick Cancer" Football game! The team will wear Pink and will be raising money for Breast Cancer Research. About two years ago, we lost a beloved teacher to breast cancer. I think this has been in the works ever since. I'm sure there will lots of funds raised. As far as they know, this is only the 2nd high school in the country to do something like this. If you want to send donations to the school, leave a comment with your email address and I'll get in touch with you as soon as I can. Remember, I moderate all my comments so your email address will only be seen by me. I'll be posting about this again soon.



****
It's time for me to post about this. As you all know, October is Breast Cancer awareness month. Not only is my mother in law a Breast Cancer Survivor, I have a friend who is currently battling this disease. In addition to this, one of the teachers at my high school passed away from Breast Cancer about two years ago. While I didn't have her as one of my teachers, I saw her nearly every day. I'm sure there are others that I know that have or have had Breast Cancer, but those are the three that I think of when the words Breast Cancer come to mind.

Then there was my own potential scare. I don't remember what year, but I do remember the lump in my throat when I felt a lump in my breast. At the time, I wasn't a doctor visitor. I didn't spend a whole lot of time at the doctor because of my previous experiences with physicians. But, this lump caused me to take notice and run to the doctor. I thought she'd go, "Oh that's nothing," but she said "OOooh" and sent me to get an ultrasound. Again, I thought I'd get "Oh that is nothing," but they sent me to a surgeon. I thought the surgeon would say it was nothing, but then she decided the lump needed to be removed and biopsied. While we were at it, we had my birthmark removed as well. Prior to actually seeing both under the microscope, the surgeon thought that either could be cancerous. She even suggested that both could be and I could potentially have both Breast & Skin Cancer. Fortunately, my biopsies came back clear.

So I'd like to share with you about the Vikings Kick Cancer Football Game. The information straight from the school website is as follows:

South Granville High School in Creedmoor, NC is excited to host the Vikings Kick Cancer football game on October 22, 2010 in honor of Breast Cancer Awareness Month. This all-pink football game will take place during the regularly scheduled Friday night football game at S. Granville vs. Northwood. Game time is 7:30pm. Thanks to a generous donation from Regional Cancer Care, the Vikings will be playing the game in PINK jerseys! As far as we know, only one other high school football team IN THE NATION has ever done ANYTHING like this! This cause is near and dear to the South Granville Family. Our beloved teacher, Ms. Cynthia Twisdale lost her battle to breast cancer about 2 years ago. This year's Vikings Kick Cancer football game will be dedicated to her and all the people in our community that have been touched by this horrible disease. Proceeds will be donated to the Breast Cancer Research Foundation.

The students, staff, and Vikings community have many activities planned surrounding this game. Some include selling pink t-shirts throughout the season leading up to the game, encouraging spectators to wear pink to the game, releasing of pink balloons at kick-off in honor of those touched by cancer and much more.

In order for this event to be a success we would appreciate your support. If possible, we would love for you to consider doing a story about our event before the game to help us in getting the word out to the community at large. And, we'd also like to invite you to have a presence at our game that evening. For further information, please contact Jenny Hobgood (Vikings Kick Cancer Committee Chair) at ....


I removed Jenny's email and phone number, but feel free to contact me directly through comments and I'll be glad to give you the information to reach her. :)

Guessing Game

So lemme get real for a mome.

I am actually petrified of doctors. Terrified even. I remember once going to the Optometrist and trying to hide in the closet. I don't know where my fear came from, but it was always there. Still is if I'm being honest with myself. Other than the actual fear of Optometrists (and any doctor really), I fear the actual picking out of my glasses. So in between 7th and 8th grade, I was pretty much forced to go and get new glasses. A: My parents made me (thanks a lot Mom) and B: I really was struggling to see out of my old pair of glasses. So we went and I picked out a pair. I tried them on and thought I loved them. I thought I loved them UNTIL I saw them. Then because I felt so tortured there, I refused to go back for years ... I mean YEARS. I don't think I went for 5 or 6 years.

Of course when I went, my prescription had changed again drastically. I had someone go with me that I trusted to help me pick out frames. The trip was better, but not great. Then I started dating my husband and we went in to pick out frames. The visit was also traumatic, but the frames were byfar the best I had ever had. They were actually children's frames, but they fit my face perfectly. They were the pair I wound up marrying him in.

Sooner or later, it was time to go back. I was getting headaches and I knew that was my personal sign from God that I needed to go. But I was terrified. Then one day a lady came into the store I worked. She was so kind. Then I found out she worked for an Optometrist office right in the area. For weeks I went by and finally found the courage to go in. We worked together to find some frames and then eventually scheduled an appointment to go see the doctor.

Eventually, they got this new machine that made the visits less traumatic and there was a really awesome doctor too. I also never felt pushed to do anything I didn't want to do. It was awesome. Then a few years ago, I went in and realized that I could use a camera to help me decide on frames. This was the biggest blessing. Sooooo with all that said, today I went in to pick out new frames. I'll be going back in November for my appointment. I wanted to make sure that part of the stress of the appointment was out of the way so I went in today with camera. Can you guess which pair I chose?




Guess which pair of glasses I ordered:

Option A: I call them Steve Urkel



Option B: I call these Drew Carey. Btw: I don't know if Cleveland OH Rocks, but Cleveland NC isn't half bad.



Option C: I call these Sally Jessie Raphael's Cousin.



Option D: I call these 1955 George McFly.


Option E: Purple & Gold!

The College Trip

I had the absolute best time this year! I decided at the very beginning that flexibility was going to be key in having a great time. I wasn't going to be a clock watcher or overly worried about things. The plan was to not really have a plan. For those of you that know me in life, know this is a very difficult task for me. Even when I was deciding to date my husband, I made a pro/con list! I'm a planner by nature. I think of all possible scenarios in my head and plan ahead.

I left about 9am and drove about 3 and 1/2 hours to my friend's place. We left immediately and went to where we would be staying. It was a nice little place where there were two bedrooms and two bathrooms. We each had our own private space. We headed back to the campus where we took our own mini walking tour. We walked by the part of campus where we "used" to eat. In it's place were two new dorms and a new cafeteria. Two years ago when I was last there, they were demolishing the dorms that were there and the cafeteria. It is so sad when a huge part of our lives is gone, but the buildings in their place are absolutely exquisite.

Here's a photo of the archway that connects the dorm on the right to the dorm on the left.



Afterwards, we took a quick walk by the building where we met though we didn't go in because we weren't sure if it was open. Then we headed onto the Wesley Foundation. For those of you not in the know, a Wesley Foundation is United Methodist campus ministry sponsored in full or in part (depending on the congregation) by the United Methodist Church on a non-church owned and operated campus. While we attended the Wesley Foundation, it was downstairs of the church. Since my last visit, they have added onto the United Methodist Church and the Wesley Foundation is now in the upstairs.

While I am not huge on change, this was absolutely beautiful. We always entered through the back of the church, but now the Wesley Foundation members can enter from the front of the church easily as it is now upstairs and there is a bridge connecting the foundation to the road. It's very nice. I failed to get a lot of photographs, but here is the backside of the church.


We spent quite a bit of time looking around. In the late 90's, if I wasn't in class, my room or the library, I was here sharing my love for Christ through socializing, singing and worshiping. It was the best part of my collegiate experience. It was in this place where I made close knit friends. Not only did I have great college friends, but there were adults there that guided us to make good choices during our college careers that represented Christ. Each student that wanted was partnered with couples at church. We became family. We were there for each other physically, emotionally and spiritually. I still talk to Kathy & Gene often.

Now I have often wondered if there were remnants of our lives there during our time at the Wesley Foundation. Seeing the addition to the church really made me wonder if our mark was left there. So we walked downstairs to go to what we called the Library to see if our mark was there. In 97/98, our Campus Minister Retired. This is during our time there. We had a frame made for him to honor his time and each person that was a member during that year had their photo placed in the frame. Needless to say, our mark was left. I'm in the top row on the right counting backwards from the person closest to the frame from right to left, I'm the third one there. The friend I went with is on the right side bottom one photo up on the right.



On Saturday, we tailgated at the Wesley Foundation. There were about 10 people there from during the time we attended. After a sort slide show and a lot of talking, we went to the football game. It was hot ... and the team stunk, but we had a good time anyways. (especially watching the band!)






We hung out with old friends after the game and on Sunday we went to the worship service. It was our first experience with the minister (both the Wesley Foundation Minister & the Church Minister) and they were so extremely kind. I felt very welcomed back "home" and know that I'm welcomed back anytime. I definitely remember why I attended in the first place. They have open hearts, open minds and open doors.



I'd post a photo of my friend and me, but I haven't gotten permission. So you'll have to do with the ones above! :)

On the Road again

For me the worst part of the trip is that I have to drive. Usually, I get up at the crack of dawn and head out. But this time, I decided to do things a bit differently. The other thing that is going to be different is that I typically drive straight through with no stopping unless I am running out of gasoline. I'd rather push through 5 hours of driving than stop and make it a 7 or 8 hour trip.

Well today, I'll be making a detour to pick up one of my collegiate best friends. Then we'll head out together. The other thing is that I typically stay within 10 minutes of the university. This time it's more like 30. I'm not sure how the weather is going to be. I'm not really caring. I've not packed yet. Usually I pack a week in advance. My camera isn't charged. Mentally I've been in the mountains for a week. Physically I've been in a really bad place. I'm hoping that I'll be able to push through whatever symptoms arise over the weekend and have a great time.

I even "practiced" staying up "late" last night. I didn't sleep until 11pm and got up at 6:45 just to see how that would go. I won't lie ... I'm exhausted this morning, but I don't have that cold I thought I was getting. I'll be taking Vitamin C with just in case it happens again.

In less than 2 hours, I'll be getting in the car with my small bag of luggage and my hangers full of clothes. I decided to carry two full hangers of clothes so I don't have to worry about wrinkles instead of just throwing everything in the luggage. We'll see how that works out. :O

Change ... my how I've changed over the last 3 years. Going to a friend's house without 20,000 maps. I only have the GPS to guide me. Going without an arsenal of medications. Going without any preconceived notion about what is going to happen. Watch out world, Jennifer is changing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yU2drg8FtBg

I just realized that the last time I was at WCU, I was sporting a PICC Line and long hair. I had made the decision not to cut my hair until I was done with antibiotics and the PICC Line. Since I got it cut, I've kept it fairly short since. I say "fairly" because I don't like "short short" hair. :) It took me one hour to pack, shower and dress. That's not bad --- for a woman! Only missing two things from my bad that I have to grab. My camera (most important) and "Hot Hands." (ya know those things you open up and keeps your hands warm?). I have to check the weather forecast.

AHHHH in less than 30 minutes I'll be on the road! I'm so excited I could burst!

So far

My Xtra tab of Vitamin C, Xtra Zinc and magic drops seem to be working. I woke up feeling pretty good this morning. So I'll continue the regimen praying that it works well enough to keep me healthy during my trip. Only thing bad about the regimen is that if I overdo it on the Vitamin C, I'll spend the day in the bathroom. The rule about Vitamin C that I was given was .... (and: do not take my advice because I'm not a doctor, consult your doctor about anything before taking any vitamins or supplements PLEASE) you can take as much as you want, BUT ... once it gives you runny stools to back off by one gram. So I never know each spell whether I'm at last spells dose. So yesterday I took 6 grams in a 2 hour period. My stools are fine so far, but today I'll probably take 10 grams in 12 hours. If I can take more, I will. However I'm going to be very busy today so I may not have time to get it all in. Feels like a nursery school song.

Ole Doc Brown* gives out some meds
CZCZO
with ..
2 grams here
and 2 grams there
here a gram
there a gram
everywhere a gram gram
Ole Doc Brown gives out some meds
CZCZO

C = Vitamin C
Z = Zinc
O = over the top special magical drop

* 2 Million Bonus points to the first person that can accurately guess why I said "Ole Doc Brown."

IN 4.5 seconds

I go from "unsick" to "getting sick" very quickly. I mean in like 4.5 seconds quickly. I was fine an hour ago. Now my nose is getting drippy and my head hurts. Pray that it goes away very quickly because I leave Friday for my Homecoming weekend. I'm taking Xtra Vitamin C and Zinc tonight with my special drops too hoping to keep it away., but first comes prayers. Pray that I don't get sick. Thanks!

October

October is going to be crazy busy for me. I typically have one big planned thing in a month. It's most of the time not even really that big of plans, but this month ... the plans are enormous. Seems like the month is filled with one thing or another. I'm having to cut out things that I would really love to do because I don't think I'll have the energy for it. We'll see though. I may still do those things after all.

I'm getting my hair done. This takes energy out of me in and of itself. Something about sitting in one place unable to move for over an hour just does me in. I always get back feeling fatigued and exhausted.

I'm leaving to go to the mountains. I'll head to Hickory first and then onto my Alma Mater for the Homecoming weekend. I'm sure a trip to the Clothing & Gifts store will be the first order of business to purchase my Purple & Gold Apparel if I arrive before I can check into the lovely mountain Inn I have booked for the trip. I haven't bought a new WCU shirt in two years. I wear them often so they are quite worn out.

Tailgating (What? ME?; yes just with no Alcohol people!), Alumni Church Meeting and Football Game. I'm sure there will be other things to pop up as I run into a few people I know. Because I'm going Homecoming weekend, there are several college friends that are going. One I haven't seen in about 13 years. I'm pretty excited about that!

I'm sure I'll be to sing this at least once with the Pride of the Mountains Marching Band! Yes, they sing!

Hail to thee, our Alma Mater
Faithful, kind, and true;
Every son and every daughter
Offers praise to you.

Hail to the dearest spot of all;
Hail to WCU!
Light and life and fond devotion
All to thee are due.

Headed back to Hickory first and then back home.

The following day is our big Work Professional Day. These about take the breath out of me. It's really exhausting learning a lot of stuff in one day. :P

Then that same week is UNC Basketball Baby! Late Night with Roy. I may have to cut this from my agenda. :(

October 22nd: My High School Alma Mater is having this HUGE big deal game! It's a "Vikings Kick Cancer" Football game! The team will wear Pink and will be raising money for Breast Cancer Research. About two years ago, we lost a beloved teacher to breast cancer. I think this has been in the works ever since. I'm sure there will lots of funds raised. As far as they know, this is only the 2nd high school in the country to do something like this. If you want to send donations to the school, leave a comment with your email address and I'll get in touch with you as soon as I can. Remember, I moderate all my comments so your email address will only be seen by me. I'll be posting about this again soon.

The next day, I really want to go to Charlotte. My favorite movie is Back to the Future. They are going to present it in only two movie theaters in NC and both are in Charlotte. SO, if I want to go, I better buy tickets now. The problem with this is that I will be up really late on the 22nd and I'd have to leave at the crack of Dawn on the 23rd. But, it's a once in a lifetime kind of thing. SOoooo I might have to bite the bullet and do it anyways!

I feel like there is other stuff too, but I can't recall right now what everything is. The two biggest are WCU trip and the HS Football Game.

I'm no Betty Crocker

I probably have maybe 5 things I can make in the kitchen. I am no Betty Crocker. There is really only one thing I can make that is *really* good. This is the one thing that gets requested at "functions" (that I don't go to so I rarely even make). It's my Granny's special Homemade Macaroni & Cheese. Well recently I began reading a blog that made me go "YUM." I saw one thing and thought, "I bet I can make that." Now this rarely happens and even when it does, the "thing" winds up in a trash faster than it comes out of the oven. But, I decided to give it the ole heave ho and try it anyways. It's called Peanut Butter Marshmallow Krispy topped Brownie, but I think I'd have to rename it to, "Dr. P would never approve this Brownie."

I used the Brownie recipe that "Skinny Chick" used and wouldn't you know ... it turned out rather well. There are a few changes I would make should I choose to do this again, but turns out maybe I'm no Betty Crocker ... but her really bad cooking cousin Barbara who lucks up every now and again.

Surprises

I'm not a huge fan of surprises. I do not like to discover things suddenly and unexpectedly. That's not to mean that surprises don't have their joys, but generally speaking I am not a huge fan of them. I guess I have this image in my head of a room full of people waiting to yell "Surprise." The unknowing culprit about to walk into the room where the room full of anticipation is growing. The air in the room sucked out of by the people holding their breath trying to be very quiet .. just the whole thing makes my heart palpate.

Then there are the whole other kind of surprises. You head out to a friend's house and they announce to you that you're going to have "Pineapple Surprise* " for dessert. You enjoy your dinner and then begin to dig into the dessert. Oh it is the best thing ever. You ponder what the "surprise" is that makes it so tasty. Ten years later you find out ,that *surprise*, there was absolutely nothing extra special in the Pineapple Surprise Dessert.

Of course there are the little surprises of life along the way like detours. Now that I have the GPS, these surprises go over a little easier. But I would rather not have these daily surprises pop up on me. I think it all has to boil down with change. There have been a few good "surprises." Like the time that my husband surprised me by bringing home a "new" type of Mozzerella Cheese Stix. Now, I am one for consistency. I'm a consumer of cheese. I have great expectations and generally stick to the same brands. I wasn't expecting to like it, but surprise I did. Then there was the time I even surprised myself by climbing Cape Hatteras.

After a decade of Lyme Disease, nothing should surprise me regarding my health. However, it does. And I don't like it! Last night I went to bed and felt a pinch of pain in my lower back. Then it migrated to my shoulders and as if that weren't bad enough I woke up with a twisty writhing pain in my hand. I turned the light on and realized my hands were swelling. I removed my wedding rings and tried to rest through the writhing twisty pain in my body.

It also feels like I worked out too long with a bookbag full of 50 collegiate books on my back. I remember feeling this way every day for years. I forgot what the pain was so I was completely surprised when I felt a twinge last night. I'm not a huge fan of surprises.

Making Plans

I've always been a planner. A list maker. No matter what I've done, there has always been a plan. Sometimes a written out detailed list of what was going to happen. Times, places, people, things I need to take with. Even if there wasn't a written list, there was a list in my head. Almost constantly. Then, I got Lyme.
I'm not sure if Lyme made it worse or better. I'm constantly thinking of times, places, people, things I need to take with, but I'm also more apt to be a little more spontaneous though .. also a little more stringent in where I go and how late I am out.

Typically now a days, I don't make concrete plans anymore. It's partially to do with how I never really know how I am going to feel on any given day. But, it's also partially to do with how I have been disappointed over the years in others that break plans. However because of Lyme, I think that I've learned to "plan for the worst, but hope for the best."

Case in point: One of my close friends is notoriously bad for standing me up. She (oh that got you guys to thinking eh? I hardly have any female friends) has so much on her plate that she just fails to remember she's made plans with me. This person doesn't have children. This person doesn't have a husband. She's just busy. ALL the time. It used to really bother me. Who am I kidding, it still bothers me. I haven't seen this person in over a year. In fact, I may have only seen this person one time since my Lyme Diagnosis. This person simply overplans. This person will make plans with about 10 different people in a day and when she gets overbooked with things to do, I'm the one that gets cut lose. That stings just a little. Every time she plans to visit, I think "Oh she won't come." Now I say 99 percent of the time, she does not come. Can you imagine the elation I feel the 1 percent of the time, she actually does show up? It's huge!

Well I don't like to disappoint people like my friend disappoints me. So instead of making firm plans anymore, I just pretty much have reigned it to say we'll have to see closer to the time. Before I would have jumped in with both feet already having a list of things I'd need to do to be able to do said things. This week was a tough week. A very tough week. One of the toughest weeks I have had in a year. Outside of work, I did two "spontaneous" things. However, imagine if I had made plans for those same items say on Monday. The day I wound up at Urgent Care having a shot of Cortisone slammed in my rear end muscle and slept for 3 hours upon arriving home from said shot. I would have disappointed people which would have disappointed me.

In October, I have two set in stone plans. This kind of scares me. No matter how badly I feel, I will more than likely go to both set in stone plans ... especially since the first event cost me a great deal of money to attend. Doesn't help though that I had such a "bad health week" so close to said event. What if I'm so exhausted I can barely keep moving? Fortunately I have people in my life that push me through the worst part until I can actually collapse from fatigue.

The other is that in the first event, I have people there that understand what I have been through and know where the nearest ER is just in case. ;) Even though I won't need it, it does help knowing that it's available. I used to not worry about such things. I'd go on vacations and not even think where is the nearest Urgent Care or ER. Until I got Lyme. Then I'd constantly ponder such things. We (hubby and I) go to the beach and when we pass the hospital on the way to the hotel, I always point it out. I've (knock on wood) never needed them, but still nice to know that they are there.


I imagine by the end of October that my body is just going to collapse. I just wish that most people got it. That most people understood. I get invited to a barbeque. Can I go? I just don't know. And I won't know until that day. It just depends on how I feel. And if I do go? I won't eat. And they'll be offended. They just don't get it. Then it gets to the point where people just don't invite me anymore. That stings too.

Guess that's what is on my mind lately. Making plans, breaking plans, wishful thinking that Lyme could disappear to the point where I could start having a life on Friday and Saturday nights that don't include a mattress, pillow and a blanket. (aka Sleep)

Quiet Month

I was once asked how I balance blogging, family, work and illness. Well this month, it's been very quiet. I've just been way too busy to really think about the blog.

Between preparing for work stuff, doing family stuff, surviving an allergic reaction and dealing with Prednisone fall out, the blog has been the last thing on my mind.

Hope you all didn't miss me too much.

The Shot I'd Never Get

For the past three & half years, I pretty much swore (except like MckMama, I don't) that I would never ever get a steroid shot. I have gone to the Urgent Care on a number of occasions and they've written me out oral prescription for steroids along with suggesting a shot of steroids. I have always denied. I try to tell them why, but they look at me like I have five eyes. There is widespread thought by Lyme patients that steroids can cause a severe increase of symptoms. I for one am intrigued by the thought because I myself had oral dose of steroids and it was shortly after that when the straw broke the camel's back. Coincidence? I'm not sure. One thing I was sure of was, "That's the shot I'd never get."

Well Saturday morning, I woke with a tiny bit of itching in my left ear lobe. I thought it was odd, but then again I am prone to itching. I'm also prone to mosquito bites. So I thought maybe a mosquito had entered the house and bit me in my sleep. Well as the day progressed, the ear became more and more inflamed and itchy. Slowly, both ears became itchy. Last night I slept a total of 60 minutes due to the itchy nature of my ear lobes. Also in the middle of the night my arm started itching. So I went to work because well I love my job and this is a huge week for us and at some point I felt like just chopping off my ears they were driving me absolutely bonkers.

So once I left work for the day, I drove straight to Urgent Care. I was hoping that the words steroids would not be mentioned, but honestly I expected it. Went over my symptoms, my medicines, my surgeries, my allergies and waited. Then the doctor came in. After we had a few minute discussion, he determined that I *must* be having an allergic reaction to something (duh). He immediately started talking about the oral pred pack and then he said the words .. "The nurse will be right in to give you a shot. It will clear that rash and itchiness right up." I gulped and decided that I couldn't tolerate one more day of this itchiness and gave in to the shot. OUCH. For about 10 seconds, I forgot about the itchiness because my butt hurt so bad that I couldn't focus on my ears.

I'm praying that this doesn't screw up my Lyme progress. I just couldn't take the itchy swollen ear lobes anymore.

PS. My ear is less swollen and less itchy. I took 12.5 mg of Benedryl to try to get the itching to ease off even more. The problem is that the shot can cause "restlessness." The special place where they inserted said shot hurts as well. OUCH. So between the ouchy and the restlessness and the slight itchiness ... i'm behind in sleep again tonight. However, I did get a couple of hours this afternoon right after the shot was given. Even though the area was painful, I was so exhausted that I just passed out as soon as my face hit the pillow. Just in case there was some allergen in my sheets, I put on new sheets before hitting said pillow. ;)

The Cold that Almost Was

The Cold that Almost Was by Jennifer The Lyme Patient

Once upon a time a beautiful tired Queen woman woke up with a very sore throat. The tired woman knew that this was a sign of things to come as this had happened a multitude of times before. In previous months, the woman would wake with the sore throat and a snuffly nose. Within days of this occurrence, the tired woman would begin to cough. Within 5 days, the beautiful tired Queen woman would wind up with pneumonia, bronchitis or sinus infection.

A few years ago, the great and powerful wizard gave this tired woman a bottle. This bottle contained magical drops that appeared to fight off powerful bacterial and viral infections. The tired woman also had a case of amnesia forgetfulness when she would awake the very first morning with sore throat. The woman would forget the drops existed.

Well five days ago, the tired woman woke with a very sore throat and she felt a slight dripping in her nasal passage. This time was different however. The health spirits were with her on this day and she remembered the magical drops in the tiny bottle. So she walked over and opened up the bottle dripping 10 drops of the magical juice into her mouth. The next morning she awoke expecting to have a stuffed nose and a slight cough, but instead only had a small sore throat.

Excited about the prospects of not going through cold turns to something really bad, she again took 10 drops of the magical juice. By the next morning, the tired woman felt pretty good. There was no sore throat, no stuffy nose and absolutely no coughing. The woman decided to take 5 more drops of the magical juice. And that is how 25 drops of magical glory gave this woman health instead of the Cold that Almost was.


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That was 3 days ago. I feel fabulous. Now, there is a small chance I'll actually get a cold that turns into something more dastardly, but for now ... I'm thrilled that 25 drops fixed my cold that almost was.