Sunday, May 9, 2010

Strong Mothers

I have a lot of memories that remind me only of my Mom. Usually these moments revolve around disappointment. Now hold on a second .. this isn't what you think. This is not one of those posts where I talk about how she disappointed me time after time. This is a post about how I would have disappointments and she would fix them. She always fixed them or at least she tried.

Now I don't recall exactly what grade I was in, but I recall a very disappointed ballet dancer. I do not recall the dance, but I do recall the beautiful pink outfit I was to wear to the recital. I know she knows exactly where I am going with this memory. My entire class was so excited to get our new silky feeling pink outfits and they ran really late. Well I don't remember how it happened (and I don't even know that I ever knew the reason), but the entire classes outfits were way too small. When I say too small, I don't mean just a little bit too small.

I mean my particular outfit didn't even cover up what it needed to cover if you know what I mean. I already had visions of all of us dancing in our practice leotards and tights OR worse 1/2 nekid on stage. I think I remember a switcharoo trying to take place to see if anyone's outfit would fit, but if I recall correctly it was a no go. What I do recall is that my mother ... saw my disappointment and fixed it. I don't know if she fixed it for everyone, but she fixed my disappointment. She simply cut out the crotch of my poorly fitted beautiful costume and cut up one of her own dresses that had taken up residence in my closet for my own dress up necessities to sew in a brand new crotch so that my outfit would cover my entire body. In that moment, I knew that my Mom was a genius!

My Mom was also not the kind of mother that would go out of her way to give me her opinions on my friends. I always had a say in the friends I chose. I remember a few people I chose to have in my life that I know she did not care for. She would always remind me that I had the right to choose my friends and even though that person was someone she wouldn't have chosen for me, that one day I would realize that they were not the kind of friends I needed to have. Usuually it only took one or two disappointments in them for me to realize ... my Mom was a genius!

I once dated a guy that I know she did not approve of. This one guy, I couldn't get out of my system. One day, he showed up with his brand new truck (sigh ~ who knew I'd fall for a guy with a truck) and asked for us to talk. Mom gave me a look, the look that only Mom could give and make me feel completely horrible for actually wanting to go. Then she went over and pulled out a 20 and told me to use it to get as close to home as possible if I were uncomfortable and to call home and they would come get me. Well I didn't need the 20, but I did go. Of course months and months later, my heart was disappointed once again. My Mom was a genius.

Now the worst disappointment I ever faced was a choice that my parents made when we moved from the only town I ever knew (dramatic enough?) to another town that might as well had been in another state. I remember time and time again thinking that my Mom was NOT making a smart move. Why would she take me away from the only town I ever knew with some of the best friends a gal could have to move me to this horrible no good very bad town? I mean I had to leave Marie, Jennifer, Leigh Anne, Wade, Melissa, Adam, Erin, Kevin, Angel, Jimmy, Michael and so many others. What on earth could I gain by moving to some podunk town ? Well, it took me years to see it, but my Mom was a genius. ;)

Let me tell you the honest truth. Every guy I dated, I secretly ran through the Mom code of ethics. Before I started dating my husband, I was concerned that my parents wouldn't like him. Why? We met when I was still in high school and he had already graduated college and was holding down a real job. He was a whopping four years older than me. He was a college graduate with a real job. Um looking back, why was I concerned? He had a REAL JOB. I already had a feeling that I liked him more than just friends, but I had to scan him through the Mom code of ethics. I was already in college at this point and had come home for a wedding. Well before I went back to college, we decided to hang out that morning.

He picked me up (on time might I add) and we just had fun hanging out. Decided before I left, I would give him a mom screen and took him inside to introduce him to my parents. Well I'll leave out of the nitty gritty details of their first meeting, but let's just say it was a card of a good time (chuckles under breath). When he left, I felt really good about their brief encounter and thought if he ever asked me out I would definately say yes because my Mom is a genius.


When I was really into the New Kids on the Block, well .. Mom hung tough.

When I was really into Paula Abdul, well ... she was spellbound

Then there was the year years of "BP"and I was stuck on this song .. and this song only! I must have listened to it 10 times a day. Of course I didn't listen to it outloud. I listened to it on my walkman .... and sang it. So she only heard my version of the song.

Thanks for hanging in there Mom. :o)

Since it is Lyme Disease awareness month, I would like to share one article on another Mother. This mother is the wife of a Lyme Doctor and she has an amazing story all her own.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I love you!