Sunday, May 23, 2010

Looking backwards

I have been so busy looking at the lab results since Saturday morning that the numbers started to blur. Since I'm a Number's Girl, I decided to get organized and look at all the numbers. So I pulled a pile (we're talking HUGE pile) of papers and started sorting them. Doctors Receipts, Lab Reports, Insurance Papers, Symptom Papers, etc. I had already sorted some a little over a year ago into two notebooks. So I punched holes into the latest papers and put them in the notebook.

One of the tabs I have is "My Symptoms." Now really I don't have a whole lot in that section because I keep everything on my computer, but I did have a few papers printed out. However, there was one page that caught my eye. It was August & September 2008. It all started on August 18th. I had a simple PICC Line bandage change. By the next morning, there was pus all under my bandage and the bandage came up. I had only had my PICC line for a month. I was anxious that I was getting an infection already. I went in for another bandage change on the 19th.

I wrote, "On the 26th, I got lost going home. I couldn't think straight. I was extremely emotional and cried often frustrated with my limitations." The next day my blisters were healing and dried out with the new bandage regiment. My arm was great for a few days. I thought I was in the clear. On September 2nd, I had my IV Glutathione and a dressing change. My arm looked wonderful. All of the blisters had dried out.

I wrote, "Dead skin easily came right off as M cleaned the area with alcohol. Noticed right away upon arriving home that it was itching. Later that evening it started hurting and was very itchy." It was at that time that I tried to go to sleep, but woke up in pain from the itching. I attempted Benedryl, heat and ice to stop the itching. However, it just wouldn't stop. I begged my husband to change the dressing at one in the morning. I got about 2 hours of sleep and when I woke up my dressing was covered in pus. I kept an eye on the area, but by 9:30 there was moisture under the dressing. I had to rush to the office for a dressing change.

By the time I got home (only 30 minutes later), it was already leaking. I went back later for another test and got a third dressing change for the day. I remember that day. I honestly thought I might die from an infection. I thought I was about to lose my picc line after only having it for a little over a month. The next day I went back because my gauze was wet again and an appointment was scheduled for the hospital for hte following day. I just knew that September 5th would be the day they would pull my PICC. I just knew that I would no longer get any treatments. However, the doctor allowed me to keep it in and gave me instructions on cleaning and a new kind of dressing for my picc line.


This is why I don't want to look backwards. I had so much trouble with my PICC line. Allergies get more severe with time. If I was that "allergic" to the solutions then, what makes me think that this time would be easier? I know I'm jumping the gun, but it was in January when I was told if certain lab works didn't improve significantly that I would need IV treatments. Those numbers didn't improve hardly at all. I'm a little worried, but trying not to let those worries get the best of me.


Lisa Buffaloe said...

I'm praying for you, Jennifer. ((((Jennifer))))

Renee said...

I am lifting you up in prayer Jennifer.

PJ said...

(((hugs))) and prayers

Kara said...

Hang in there! I totally agree that looking back is hard ... really hard. May the Lord give you the peace you need so you can feel his love. He is always there to support and give strength ... and sometimes carry us when we need a lift. Sleep well tonight. You are in my prayers. ~Kara

Jennifer said...

Awww my four Lyme friends that I've never met. You guys are completely awesome.