62 Tornadoes in NC

Yesterday was a frightful day in North Carolina (and surrounding states). There were 62 tornadoes. I spent a good portion of 15 minutes in the bathroom terrified, though most of the day shaking in my skin. I thought there was a good possibility that we'd get hit by one of the many tornadoes. There are 24 deaths in North Carolina confirmed so far.

Many stores including a Lowe's Home Improvement store were destroyed. One university has suspended classes for the duration of the Spring Semester because of damage to the building. Many schools will be delayed or closed. Many families lost their homes and many people lost loved ones.

Thankfully, my neighborhood was unscathed and as far as I know all my friends and family members are safe. However I know people that are friends with people that lost family. They are devastated and for that I am devastated for them.

I'm still kicking

I just haven't been around much lately. I've been working hard and for some reason neglecting this.

Yesterday I had a very exciting day. I drove a little over an hour to meet someone I've been talking with online about Lyme. I am now proud to call her a friend. I spent quite a long time there and we even watched Under Our Skin together. We talked a lot about Lyme, but mostly about life.
Yesterday I felt as if we were old dear friends that were hanging out on the couch instead of people that were strangers less than two months ago.

The project

We're having a gallery auction. The kids are going to create one masterpiece (one per class) and we'll auction them off. The highest bidder wins. The money is going to help the Tsunami Victims in Japan. I purchased the materials for the project and gave it out on Friday. I can't wait to see each classrooms creations.

sometimes I wake up

in such a great mood. I have no idea why, but I wake up SMILING. It's such a great feeling! :}

I have a post in mind to do, but I've not had time (imagine that!) to work on it. I'm working on a really big project at work and it pretty much consumes my mind at all times. I'll share about that later because I'm really excited about it. Anyways .... got to run to work (or drive ... that's my preference since it's a good 45 minute drive).

Surviving the Raw Nose

I've seen to get over the worst part of the illness. I'm still coughing (which always lasts forever), but the thing that surprises me is the amount of mucus! Oh My Word. It just seems to be non-stopped. My nose was pure raw from the blowing. I finally had to pull out vaseline and pretty much lather it on my nose and lips after every single nose-blow.

Update

So I was pretty sick over night. Yesterday I fought to stay at work. Probably paid the price last night. I was doing pretty well, but decided on a whim to take some Night Time Delsym. Figured it would help me sleep and keep the coughing at bay over night. So I took the dose around 8pm. Around midnight, I woke up burning up. I thought that I had turned up my electric blanket so I checked it. It was OFF. Apparently I was so hot that I turned it off in my sleep. There are 10 levels on my blanket and I generally sleep with it on level 3 or 4. Sometimes hotter and sometimes cooler, but mostly 4. So I was shocked when it was OFF.

I decided to check my temperature and was a little stunned when I saw it say 100.5. I decided to wait 30 minutes to recheck and as I laid there ... I got hotter and hotter. When I rechecked it hit the 102 mark. I decided it was time to go ahead and take Tylenol. I went ahead and got a bottled water and Tylenol thinking that soon I'd be able to go back to sleep. Well by 2am, my temperature had reached a shocking 103.5. I stumbled into the kitchen to get a cool wet cloth for my body. I knew I had to take care of that fever quickly, but I can't take Motrin. Motrin makes my eyes swell up. It may help with the fever, but the last time I took Motrin I wound up at the Urgent Care getting a Steroid Shot.

I argued with myself over whether to use the Motrin or not and in the end decided that I would hold off. I continued to check. At 3:30am, it was 104.6. At this point I was pretty much out of it trying to sip water. Throughout all of this, I talked out loud to God. I knew He was with me. I knew He wouldn't give me more than I could handle. I remember asking for him to take away the fever. Somewhere around 4, I essentially passed out and woke at 5am when my alarm went off. I felt the coolness of the sweat and knew my fever broke.

Needless to say, I will be starting those antibiotics because I haven't gotten any better and all the factors my doctor said to watch out for started. I'm so glad to be alive. I'm so glad to be alive. Praise God I'm still alive.

cough cough sneeze

Because I'll have a long day of work tomorrow and because my head hadn't improved with Claritin or Zyrtec or Tylenol or any other thing and this morning was even worse, I decided to cough my way to the doctor.

I sound completely pathetic so if no one gets phone calls this week ... it's because it is down right frustrating to talk. When I left work today, I called over to my PCP to see if by chance they could squeeze in a sick visit. I was thrilled when they asked if I would be willing to see "K." "K" is the nurse practitioner that I saw before my diagnosis. She sent me here and there trying to find out what was wrong with me. Though I was frustrated with no diagnosis, I loved seeing her. She knows my "preferences." And what I mean by that is that she knows which antibiotics I prefer and she also knows that I prefer to do something else before antibiotics. So I went in today telling her about my symptoms. I knew that I didn't have an infection yet, but I also knew that within 24 to 48 hours I might.

I told her what I had tried (minus some special integrative things that she probably has never heard of) and what I thought. She investigated (looking at my ears, nose and throat) and told me that there was no infection (yet), but that she would write me a script just in case the tides turned. She also sent me on my way with 7 days worth of samples of Singulair ( I used to take it before Lyme during the seasonal times). I get to take this and hopefully it will improve. If not, then Zithromax will be my friend again. While it's not my favorite antibiotic, I know it works.

Gah! These pollinating trees are going to be the death of me. I think every bone in my face hurts. Hopefully the Singulair will work and I won't need the Z pack.

Allergy Season

I love March for one reason. It's March Madness. Basketball. UNC.

However March also makes me mad. It's the start of allergy season. So I woke up yesterday with a small sore throat and itchy eyes. Thought I'd "work through it" on my own, but this morning I woke wiht even more sore throat, irritating nose drippage and a small cough. All this tells me, I better jump on this and quick. Leucozepin, Zinc, Total B drops, Vitamin D ... to start. Then add in a Claritin and finally ... I had to add in Tylenol.

I'm hoping to be able to knock this out before it turns into an infection. Lately I've not been able to do that, but we'll see.

Madness, March Madness. One part exhilarating and the other part frustrating. Speaking of both the weather and basketball.

Is it summer yet?

I'm ready for summer because I'm ready for So You Think You Can Dance. I am wanting it so bad that I googled some dancing. And I found this:




Well this search led me to look up the artist of the song. I looked her up. I couldn't believe it.
She's actually a friend of mine. I didn't realize she was a singer/song writer. We had never talked about our careers. We had only talked about bad Doctors, Integrative Medicine, PICC Lines, Heavy Metal Poisoning and Lyme Disease. Anyways, I wanted to share with you Alisa's music.

Here's the full song called Breathing by Alisa Turner



Here is another song that I just have fallen in love with .. I can't get the tune out of my head.It's called Trouble.



Alisa is so sweet. I've seen her struggles, her troubles and she's seen what few have seen. Me at my very worst at the peak of my condition.

If you check out her music page on myspace, you can hear her music there too.

http://www.myspace.com/alisaturner/music/songs/trouble-68778538

Roller Coaster Changes

Life is funny sometimes. It wasn't too awfully long ago that I cried almost every day. Then one day, I forced myself to change. I didn't even realize how upset I was all the time until a friend pointed it out. She asked what happened to the bubbly Jennifer she used to know. Oh what a question that was. I thought and thought and realized that the bubbly Jennifer was still there, but very guarded. It was in that moment I made a choice to change back. I slowly chipped away at the bad bits and even through the worst moments of my life managed to smile through the pain. I opened up my soul, my heart, my spirit to those around me. Every day, I change just a little bit. And today as I was thinking about this, it reminded me about this song sung by Addison Road. I realized that no one is perfect, not even those that we look up to and respect. Even those that we've known for a while can do things that hurt us. So what do we do when someone we respect and look up to hurts us or someone we love? We forgive because one day ... there will be a change in the making.

Has it really been four years?

It's hard to believe that today marks the fourth year of my Lyme diagnosis. I can't believe I've been through hard core antibiotic treatment, hard core IV alternative treatment and came out the other side of the Lyme life.

I can't believe it's been four years since a doctor finally listened to me and explained to me why I had Lyme Disease and why all the testing had been wrong. I'm so blessed to be alive. Four years and a day ago, I honestly thought I was dying. And here I am, four years later, blessed to be alive. Thank you God for sending me a phenomenal doctor who thinks outside the box.

Because he thought outside of the box, I've been able to live.

Flowers courtesy of my wonderfully thoughtful husband on Valentine's Day.

Sensory Overload

Sometimes I have days where every little thing irritates me. Every night I pretty much have the same routine. Between 7pm and 8pm, I crawl into bed and play a CD that helps me relax and fall asleep. We have the room darker than a cave for most people's standards, but for me some nights ... it just isn't dark enough. The little red light on the TV when it's powered off might as well be a flashlight. I already have black tape covering the time on the clock, but the light that glows behind it ... might as well not even have it covered. I use an electronic toothbrush. I can't charge it at night because the glow is way too bright. Now on most nights I can ignore these little "lights." (this doesn't even talk about the sound that the TV makes when it's not on or the computers from the other room or the cars and dogs that are outside making noise that live down the street). Last night on the other hand. All these little things kept me from going to sleep. Sensory Overload.

I played my CD 3 times before giving up and getting up. Then I was up for an hour before laying back down for the CD to play twice before I just turned on the television set. Then I played it one final time and finally fell asleep sometime between 4 and 4:15. I fell asleep after 4am, but before 4:15am. My alarm goes off at 5am. 45 minutes of sleep I figure with waking once during that time to think "good I finally fell asleep."

Hopefully I can function today.

Closet Update

Photo taken today. It's still clean! :o)

The Closet

So in January (9th and 10th), I cleaned and organized the closet. I took photographs and posted. Once the batteries in my camera recharge, I'll post a picture of the state of the closet now. But first, who thinks it's still clean 37 days later?

Losing Friends

Today my heart sank to my stomach. I woke up to see a friend's status on Facebook. My heart sank a little bit for her. I saw that she lost a friend to lung cancer. I saw the first name of her friend and prayed that it wasn't a friend of mine from many years ago. I went onto work. I didn't think about it again. Then my boss called me into the office as I was leaving. The words stung my heart and pierced my soul.

"Pam (removed last name) passed away last night. " I felt the lump form in my throat. It was all I could do to hold the tears back. The only thing that made this loss different from our last friend that went to Heaven was that her family had preparation. Her family knew this was coming. A loss of a friend/family member when you know is difficult, but along the journey of the rest of their life you mourn.

My heart aches for my friend's family. My heart aches for her beautiful daughters, her husband of 32 years and anyone that ever crossed her path. Forgive me if I'm quiet. I tend to retreat when I mourn.

Move that Rubber Tree Plant

I am

I was talking with a new friend last night. It got me to thinking about all the things I am. I often wonder about people's first impression about me and about my own first impressions about others. Let's face the cold hard truth that when we meet people we try to put our best foot forward. We try to offer all the best parts of ourselves to them and peel back the layers of ourselves a little bit at a time.

There are many things that we can learn just based on LOOKING at a person and then there are things we learn by LISTENING. Then there are things we think we know by ASSUMING.

If I show you these two photographs ... what might you assume?


Assumption: Lover of outdoors
Fact: 15 minutes outside is 15 minutes too long.

Who am I? By my choosing, I am several things. I am Christian. I am a wife and friend. I am a teacher. I am a college graduate. These are things I chose to do. Then there are things that I am that I have no control over. I am proud just the same, but they weren't under my control. They were things I was born into. I am a daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece. There are so many other things that I am.

But there is one more thing that affects my daily life, but it is not who I am ... it is what I have. It took me years to say it comfortably. If you're just beginning your journey, it may take you a while too. However one day, you too will be able to say "I have Lyme Disease." It will roll off your tongue like "My name is Jennifer." As my new friend and I discussed last night, it's almost like an AA meeting. "Hi My name is Jennifer and I have Lyme Disease."

2010 in Review

2010 had some ups and downs. I was supposed to have written this by now. Apparently, I've been slack. I scheduled it to post today figuring I'd have it completed. I only completed 2 months. Oh well. Here ya go.

January of 2010 One year ago I was given the best news: Concerns for Lyme Disease: And I quote, "No further treatment should be needed at this time." Of course I was also told to be conscious of risk for relapse.

We also enjoyed my birthday with some really extra sweet cake ~ the cake Debacle of 2010

The almost birthday snow.

February of 2010

In Feb of 2010, we got snow at least twice. In fact, I risked my life for my children.

And at the Alumni Game, it started to snow while we were there. I almost fell a couple of times and gripped onto him for dear life. But, seriously a great time was had by all. Alumni Game with my best friend at UNC.

Then we found the list of symptoms I had in 2006. It's amazing to think how sick I was almost five years ago.





IN 2009

In 2008

Pain

Just because I don't complain about it doesn't mean it's not there. I learned a long time ago how to cope with Lyme pain (without medication too). However, I've pretty much been down and out since yesterday at waking time. It feels like someone is taking a knife and jabbing into my brain. I thought eventually it would improve, but finally decided to take Tylenol. Figured it would help. I figured wrong. It still feels like someone is jabbing my brain with a knife.

Top it off with a lot of back pain and stomach cramps, I'm pretty bad shape today. I know part of it is that lovely visit from my monthly friend. In fact, MOST of it is the visit from my monthly friend. However working 80 hours over the last 2 weeks hasn't helped. I really haven't worked 80 hours in 2 weeks in YEARS. I typically work at most 6 hours a day. Sometimes with an 8 hour thrown here or there. However over the last 4 weeks, I've worked many 9 hour days each week. My body feels like it's going to die and soon. I was even limping when I stood up after sitting to feed a baby. Of course I get asked, "What's wrong?" I want to scream, "I still have it. It doesn't just go away. I just have learned how to cope with it and most days I'm pretty fine." Instead I say, "I'm fine." I walk out of the room and try to cope with it better before I walk into the next room. Next week I have two 9.25 hour days scheduled. BACK TO BACK. This has happened the last few weeks. Last week I was actually not scheduled for this, but it happened when we had too many teachers call out sick.

So now it leaves me down & out for the weekend. I have to try to pull myself back together for tomorrow. It's a short day tomorrow unless someone calls out.

To David

I have been emailing with you about your wife. I have been trying to respond for the last week or so. However for some reason, my internet browser crashes whenever I reply to your messages. So I thought I would respond here out in the open so that you would know I wasn't ignoring your messages.

I did both the High Dose IV Vitamin C and IV Glutathione. I didn't do "shots." I did full on IV's. Typically took 3 hours when I did straight out IV's, but it took less time when I had my PICC line. I believe those two things were huge in my recovery process. Now while I am not feeling 100 percent, I am working 35 to 40 hours a week and not sleeping my days away. I used to sleep a LOT more. While my friends think I'm insane for going to bed at 7:30 or 8pm, what they may not realize is that I used to nap every afternoon for 3 to 4 hours only to get up for food and then go back to bed by 7pm. Some people don't respond by the Vitamin C and Glutathione, but I did.

Hope this helps David.